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Sex acts

(20 posts) (12 voices)

Started 2 years ago by Zadok the second
Latest reply from Quaz

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Zadok the second

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Anyone else noticed that in tabloid-world, people 'perform sex acts'?

Do they get stage fright? How do they audition for these acts? Do they get equity minimum?

Anyone with experience of this, please enlighten me.

Posted 2 years ago #
IABP

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How about sexual practices
Is it training for the real thing?
I spent years training.

Posted 2 years ago #
wallster

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Would certainly spice up the Royal Variety Performance.

Posted 2 years ago #
Zadok the second

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I have similar questions about people who perform terrorist acts.

Posted 2 years ago #
saltire

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Marriage Zadok. All the bed's a stage and each must play his/her part.

An understudy helps,except for matinees.I like matinees

Posted 2 years ago #
Rowly

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I'm Blowed if I know

that is, for both sex acts and terrorist acts

Posted 2 years ago #
Sinnick

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I witnessed a criminal act once. Cannon and Ball.

Posted 2 years ago #
Rowly

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Me too
Blair & Brown

Posted 2 years ago #
IABP

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Sister act - you can get fed up being a fat drunken slag.

Posted 2 years ago #
andhrimnir

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I like martinis.

Posted 2 years ago #
Rowly

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I prefer Mattresses (shaken that is)

Posted 2 years ago #
nealdoran

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Performing sex acts... term seems fair enough when you consider the likelihood of being booed off.

But aside from all that, it gave me a chance to dust off one of my sensibly overlooked early efforts and bung it in the writers' room as being vaguely relevant, so I'm happy.

Did somebody mention Martinis?

Posted 2 years ago #
saltire

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Talking of Snuff movies Neal. It's dying on its feet.

Posted 2 years ago #
MrChigleysAunt

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Snuff movies? Aren't they those 18th Century Gentlemen's films?

Posted 2 years ago #
Zadok the second

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Or is it short for 'Thass 'snuff', so any film where you leave before the end?

Posted 2 years ago #
IABP

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Sex acts is better than five

Posted 2 years ago #
fernandomando

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The tabloids have their own special code.
For some 'performing a sex act' may be a bit of a mouthful.

When they talk about sex offenders, there is either an evil rapist or there is someone who inflicted a 'serious sexual assault', to which a euphemistic translation might be 'my ass hurts'

Posted 2 years ago #
Quaz

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The best sex act I ever saw was a guy who put his genitals in the mouth of a lion. Oh, and the woman in Bangkok who managed to fire out 10 dwarf clowns across the bar.

Posted 2 years ago #
rikkor

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Quaz, I'm sure your missus wouldn't want you to dredge up stories.

Posted 2 years ago #
Quaz

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Rikkor, that was at the wedding breakfast. Uncle John nearly had a stroke, but he couldn't quite reach. Never had to pay a thing for the wedding photos though, and it's so romantic to keep finding them on the internet.

Posted 2 years ago #

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