Lady Ga Ga who is partial to wearing clothes made from raw meat was today seen walking along Hollywood Boulevard wearing a string of pork sausages around her neck instead for a necklace, a mini dress made from slices of raw turkey and smoky bacon, stitched together with butchers string, platform shoes made from pork chops, several slices of spam for a hat and sausage skins for knickers.
Several men fell of bicycles as a result of not looking where they were going, one fractured his skull as he fell into a gutter.
There was also a multiple car pileup, involving mostly male car drivers, as they were distracted by the sighting of Lady Ga Ga, in yet another of her publicity stunts.
A hungry tramp attempted to use his penknife, to slice himself a piece of her dress, making it more revealing and exposing her hips.
A postman delivering mail on his bike crashed into a lamp post, resulting in the mail he was carrying, falling down a grid in the road.
Women boo'd and heckled Lady Ga Ga many of whom shouted "Get dressed you cheapskate".
Disgusted and bemused crowds started to gather to ogle Lady Ga Ga, before a pet shop owner , saw fit to call the police, after Monkeys in his shop window, commenced to jumping up and down, and becoming overly excited.
Police SWAT teams arrived and snatched Lady Ga Ga from the street, before she offended anymore passersby, or caused anymore injuries to the public, or indeed, their eyesight.
Later in Hollywood Law Courts, Lady Ga Ga appeared before Judge Butch Chopper the 8th, on charges of indecent exposure, affray, offending common decency and causing road traffic accidents and injury to the unsuspecting public.
Judge Butch Chopper, told Lady Ga Ga, that her behaviour was totally inappropriate, and that just because she was a famous singer, she was not entitled to offend or injure the public in this manner.
Lady Ga Ga said that the reason she was wearing the raw meat for clothes is that it was cooling in the hot weather and that she loved the smell of it as it turned her on.
Judge Butch Chopper, said that meat was for eating, and not for wearing, and that she was also offending vegetarians like him, and went on to sentence her to 3 years in the Offal Wing of the state penitentiary, where she will receive some much needed psychiatric treatment.
She will be getting no meat to eat, in prison, to try and cure her of her meat fetish.
Lady Ga Ga was taken to the state penitentiary in a potato truck, wearing a potato sack and shackles, which she told prison officers, was a true inspiration for a new fashion trend, when she was released.
Lady Ga Ga has be ordered to pay compensation of $50,000 to each of the injured members of the public, and $3,000 court costs.
More news later, watch this space.
