As part of its campaign to “clobber old Britain back into shape”, The Telegraph today called for a radical rethinking of universal child benefit, namely the rearranging of certain words. When pressed for details, Norman Tebbit said, “Why should hardworking doctors, lawyers and chief executives be crippled into poverty by this government’s misunderstanding of the word fair. If we cut the levels of poor children by dropping a few scallies off in Calais we could free up some much needed funds for the squeezed middle - the people who are really doing everything they can to scrape by on just £50, 000 a year and the scantest investment portfolio.”
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Poor Children To Be Cut For Universal Benefit
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