Representatives of Britain's homeless and out-of-work community have given an enthusiastic welcome for plans to spend £100 million on an advanced orbiting space camera capable of taking high-definition photographs of the UK from space.
"This couldn't have come at a better time," explained homeless 60-year-old Harry Clochard, who has been sleeping in doorways and scavenging fast-food outlets' bins for scraps since redundancy led to his house being repossessed last May. "Most nights I doss down under bits of cardboard box and get pissed on by drunks, but knowing that the UK will soon have megapixel panchromatic satellite imaging will make the nights seem that much warmer, somehow."
Struggling single mum Maria Vincent was just as effusive. "OK, so I can't afford to feed the kids half the time. But now we'll be able to huddle around high-resolution broad-swath pictures and track the progress of the country's deforestation together. God bless the UK's satellite research programme!"