The Labour Party will not lurch to the left under Ed Miliband's leadership, the newly elected Leader of the Opposition insisted today.
Following an empassioned speech announcing a five year plan to increase coal and steel production, Mr Miliband explained that the party would regain the centreground in politics by mechanising agriculture and bringing heavy industry under state control. Speaking to delegates at the party's annual conference, Mr Miliband said:
"Under my leadership, the Labour Party will quickly regain power and will work for all the people of Britain. I pledge that when we assume power I will protect the NHS budget, increase the number of police officers, and double tractor production".
"There will be those who will accuse me of being in the thrall of the Unions. But by re-nationalising the railways, the steel factories and agricultural production, I will ensure that all productive workers receive a fair wage or an equivalent in food rations."
"As for bankers' bonuses, the People's Bank launched by Comrade Mandelson before the election will be reintroduced and will assume control of all state and private finance".
Asked how he planned to reducce the budgetary deficit, Mr Miliband drew attention to a chart he had projected onto the wall showing how by turning London's Royal Parks into state run fruit and vegetable plots, he would render capitalist concepts of debt and private enterprise redundant.