Al-Qaeda yesterday announced it had gone live with its new on line booking and check-in system for would be martyrs looking to get to paradise.
Unable to cope with the recent increase in people wishing to take their '74 virgin ticket' using the traditional method of flying to Afghanistan and undergoing extensive training, a new secure website allows potential bombers to sign up as a member to the terrorist group on line (a 12 month minimum contract term is required), book their flight and even arrange the carriage of their explosives to a suitable pick up point all from the comfort of their cave or armchair.
"We are very proud of it" Mullah Abdullah, a spokesman said today, "it uses the latest technology from Tata engineering and means a prospective martyr can unleash a fire-storm of fury on the infidel the moment he has accepted the terms and conditions and paid the non-refundable deposit."
In a joint statement today MI6 and the FBI denied it was losing out in the technical innovation war against Al Qaeda. "While we are aware of the development we are confident that our combined Information Warfare departments are comfortably ahead of this terrorist organization" said a spokesman today, "However if anyone does have any information which they think will help us please don’t hesitate to post us a letter telling us about it".