Hello I'm new here too, although paradoxically at the same time I'm also quite old and Northern. I'm a writer and write things that sometimes get sold but mostly don't. I'm not funny yet but hope to be one day. Someone suggested I come here and meet similar like-minded people. That didn't come out well, but you get the idea. I like kites and witches. I have a phobia about blown vinyl, especially Anaglypta. It looks as though larvae might be growing in the bubbles. At primary school, every morning during assembly, our headmistress would walk behind us and poke us in the back with a bony finger if we weren't singing loudly enough and once she poked me and a bit of poo squeezed out between the bars of 'And Did Those Feet'.
The benefit of me is that I don't know what it was like here before so I can't moan about how better it was then. That's got to be worth something.
The drawback of me is that I often use the internet to create some kind of weird and/or wacky online 'persona' then wilt under the pressure of maintaining it because I'm really pretty mundane and stolid. The wackiest thing I've done is buy gem lettuce when it was on offer (twin pack, 50p, AsdA) then forgot it was in the crisper because I hardly ever look there. I'd look here at least twice more though, I reckon. I'm hoping some of the talent here might rub off on me and I can finally stop fearing wallpaper and master the art of brevity.
Oh. And what's a NiB?
Wait. Don't tell me. News in Brief. Obvious now. The small 'i' gave it away. Knew it had to be a little word like 'is' or 'it' or 'in' (which it was). The rest just fell into place when I went and read the links on the front page explaining all about it. Sorry for everything, I'm rambling. Never wash Tramadol down with sugary Irn Bru.
I enclose my CV and look forward to here(sic) from you soon. Best regards.