Derek Bevan of Worcester was today left lamenting the considerable effort, not to mention expense, that he's been through in an attempt to make a principled stance against the war in Iraq.
'I popped down to the local Waterstones, bought up a job load of 'Journeys' and have been setting light to them all afternoon,' he moaned. 'Have the BBC been here? Sky? Adrian Chiles and Christine Bleakley? Not a bloody sausage.'
Mr Bevan revealed that the only interest he'd received in his activities had been from his neighbour Stan who was worried the smoke might affect his begonias, but he quickly changed the subject to where Mr Bevan might be going on holiday next year.
'What's the world coming to when you can't take a stand on something that you're totally passionate about, and not be taken seriously,' said Mr Bevan. 'It's free speech gone mad. Or indifferent or something. Anyway, that's enough of that. Grand Prix's on.'