This conversation was hacked on my mobile........
Hello Dad, it's David.
Oh hello David, are you looking forward to your first PM question time?
Erm, sort of. Thing is Dad, there's been a bit of a tiny problem.
Oh God, Now what?
It's nothing really Dad, just a teensy prob about some technical widget that Andy Coulson, one of my personal aids, has been playing with.
And what's that?
Erm, bit of a thing that can sort of get into other peoples' phone conversations
Oh you mean like bugging?
Sort of, they call it phone hacking.
He's been hacking into people's phones has he?
But that's illegal surely?
Um, technically it is, but he only did it in the course of investigative journalism.
Hack is he? Oh, ha ha, excuse the pun.
Well he was, he was a newspaper editor.
News of the World.
That's not a news paper!
Yeah well. Whatever. Thing is Dad it's caused a bit of a furore and, well, what with it being my first PMQ tomorrow they're bound to lay into me over it.
I expect so Davey me boy. Comes with the job eh?
I knew you'd say that. Thing is Dad, um, I need an excuse to miss PMQ, preferably find an urgent reason to leave the country. Only for a couple of days, and I was wondering if you could help me out a bit.
Well, I know you must be having a lovely holiday and all that but when you go out to the restaurant tonight, could you just sort of start coughing and foaming at the mouth and clutch your heart and fall over? A bit.
Oh all right. But don't tell your mother, she'll have a fit.
Cheers Dad, you're a brick.