Downing Street is due to announce that Endemol, the company behind the Big Brother series, has been asked to deliver the coalition’s flagship Big Society programme. It is understood that the programme will be lead by Davina McCall and the entire nation will be invited, one by one, to enter a diary room which will be constructed at the Watford Gap motorway services area. The Government is also believed to have engaged Marcus Bentley, the Geordie commentator of Big Brother, to be the public voice of the programme. Insiders see this as a clever move to outflank Labour leadership hopefuls the Milliband brothers whose Tyneside roots could be weakened by this daring initiative.
Endemol are to be given access to the nation’s network of CCTV cameras to enable the monitoring of every UK resident. “Britain leads the world in the provision of CCTV cameras,” said a government spokesman, “and this is an exciting and creative way of combining this great strength with top quality reality TV.”
“The programme will also provide with an excellent opportunity to address the problems caused by the cuts in public finances,” said the unnamed spokesperson, “Over time everyone in the UK will be set tasks to complete and provided with the basic materials. They will be set to work repairing schools, running prisons and building roads, all as volunteers.” The spokesman denied persistent rumours that the programme will include the eviction by popular vote of UK residents as a way of reversing net immigration predicted for the coming decade.
Sources indicate that a number of foreign governments are watching this project with interest, “I don’t think we could get away with it here,” said a Russian political commentator.