Billionaire oligarch Vladimir Badenov has claimed the title of owner of the world's largest yacht, eclipsing Roman Abramovich's Eclipse by 520 feet. Badenov's new yacht, purchased in a jumble sale organised by the US Secretary of Defense Gates as part of ongoing economic stimulus efforts. Formerly known as the USS Eisenhower will be renamed Putinkin. The new yacht comes complete with a crew of 3,000, flight of F-16s, a helicopter or two and a nuclear reactor, although the last bit is to be delivered without fuel. "No worries," says Badenov. "I shall be able to get what I need in our southernmost province of Iran." The crew will be trained in the arts of serving hord'oeuvres without being physically noticeable and invisibily to offer drinks to guests. "A few SEALs come with the boat and we are confident that they can do this - subterfuge seems to be part of their very nature," Badenov said. "The Marines are eager to serve as bouncers, too" Badenov enthused. The F-16s will be sold to the highest bidder between Saudi Arabia and Israel, and the helicopters will be donated to Pakistan as a gesture of solidarity with the world's poor and suffering. "After all," Badenov insisted, "we do not wish to appear ostentatious." Badenov plans to moor the vessel inthe Black Sea where, he is assured, the Turks allow him passage through the Bosporus.
Vladimir Badenov Claims Title to World's Biggest Yacht
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