When I go abroad, I always make an attempt to speak the local language.
Not out of respect, obviously, I just find it helps me get better service.
But John and Juanita foreigner use such long complicated phrases. Often with hand gestures too!
In a UK deli, you can say Chorizo. They don't understand that in Benidorm. You have say "Chair Eats So!" Then, you have to raise your voice. "Chore eight zoo!" Then you have to shrug, pull a funny face, and look around a bit. Then, you must point at the tapas item you want and shout "YouKnow? Smelly Meat! Smellim-eat!"
Eventually, the simple folk will say: "Listen Sir, I speak English. Not so good, I apologise in advance for any grammatical errors that may creep in. We have a Fray Bentos piece and some baked beans."
It's almost as if they speak English better than us!
They knew what I wanted all the time. But I had to earn their respect you see.
You have to understand, this language bartering is all part of their ritual. Once you have won their respect and admiration, they will come and talk to you about how much they love Bobby Charlton. Just before they hand you the bill and tell you that tipping is permissable.
Does anyone else know some adorable foreign phrases?
The answers may surprise you!