Lithuanian Marium Varinauskas
Thought he was handy with his proboscis
But the copper was ticked
Marium got nicked
And now he's stopped drinking those vodkas.
There was a young man with a truncheon
Who suggested a PC should munch on
The copper said no
Which was a bit of a blow
So he had a large vodka for luncheon.
I know they're terrible, but inspiration is in short supply today.