Picture the scene, my mother-in-law, the original dour and humourless working class matriarch from hell, in her kitchen in the West Midlands. Little Miss Oxy has just worked out with some amusement that Grandma has acquired a new freezer for the n more times than even she, at age 11, can remember.
Mother-in-law [in grim West Midlands accent]: "Well ...? I doh go out, I doh drink, I doh smoke. I 'as freezers."