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Cameron: "National service not just ruse to steal more shit from poor countries" 5 Qoxiivi 5 years
Government to tackle rioters with army of Nanas 1 evilsuperstar 5 years
Chiswick vigilantes to defend Turnham Green. 1 rebel not taken 5 years
Semi-naked Worthing pensioners loot Oxfam shop. 2 antharrison 5 years
Charity Shops outwit looters. 1 rebel not taken 5 years