http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=9656 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Wed, 19 Jun 2013 09:51:25 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=9656#post-26224 Tue, 03 Aug 2010 20:40:35 +0000 arrghgarry 26224@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>under a steamroller preferably </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=9656#post-26200 Tue, 03 Aug 2010 16:20:29 +0000 Sharpehunter 26200@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Hmmmm... having just read ianslat's story I suspect that Genghis has a valid point. Very similar. But then again Genghis is very similar to that guy who used to appear on that Jeremy Beadle show! Not Matthew Kelly, the other one? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=9656#post-26197 Tue, 03 Aug 2010 15:59:05 +0000 Genghis Cohen 26197@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nice idea, but I suspect this is too much like ianslat's story from last year:</p> <p><a href="http://www.newsbiscuit.com/2009/05/03/campaigners-call-for-national-register-of-mps/">Here</a> </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=9656#post-26190 Tue, 03 Aug 2010 15:30:33 +0000 4ty2 26190@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Now I understand. I thougth Sarahs law was for the forces in Afgahnistan to shoot first and ask later. It's about Sarah moving into your neighbourhood. But thats a good thing, lots of security and no worry about burglars any more - as long as they council continue with the weekly body eh bin collection </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=9656#post-26180 Tue, 03 Aug 2010 14:06:49 +0000 ChrisHarrison 26180@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thanks Zadok. You're absolutely right about the internal logic. Really appreciate the advice and the re-write. All help gratefully received! </p> <p>Chris </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=9656#post-26168 Tue, 03 Aug 2010 12:55:33 +0000 Zadok the second 26168@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I really like this as an idea, but I think the text needs a bit of tidying up - there's a logical inconsistency at the heart, and also the title David Laws / Sarah's Law pun only works once you've got into the piece...</p> <p>I hope you don't mind, but I have had a go at tightening it?</p> <p><strong>New laws to tell people if they are living next to a suspected politician ‘will not lead to vigilante attacks’</strong></p> <p>The Government has today sought to reassure the public that their controversial plans to help parents identify political animals – the so-called ‘David Laws’ - will not lead to unprovoked attacks on innocent people.</p> <p>Concerned civil liberties groups are up in arms about the new rules, which they say could lead to mistaken identity mix-ups. Janet Carruthers, a member of Libertas, remembers the time her neighbour, Peter Mindelson was mistaken for a notorious politician. “He didn’t look anything like the slimy architect of Labour’s ups and downs, but we still had to endure three days of well-meaning but mistaken campaigners throwing bottles of lit perfume over the hedge into his garden.”</p> <p>Brian Bellows, 49 of North Gloucestershire, likes the changes however, "We work hard to be able to afford to live in this area. The last thing we want is for a Member of Parliament coming round here with their duck moats and their broken promises. I welcome any move that means politicians will be more visible." </p> <p>Simon Phelps has seen evidence of the effect of living near an MP at first hand. “I knew this young boy in Yeovil, product of a broken home, say no more, used to watch BBC Parliament. Started to flip his main residence between his mum and dad’s. Anyway, he went round his dad’s, asked for money for some football boots, Dad gave him £40; went back to his mum’s, asked for money for some football boots, she gave him £30; he went on eBay, got some boots for £20. He’s sixteen now and living in a penthouse flat overlooking the River Yeo. Bloody politicians fault, innit.” </p> <p>Despite the concerns, police remain relaxed about the possibility of unprovoked attacks. Chief Constable Paul West of the Association of Chief Police Officers said, ‘We understand that parents might be worried about the prospect of David Laws coming to their neighbourhood, but we see no reason to suspect that this might lead to bloodshed. As far as we are aware, Mr Laws has no history of violence towards other people, although he has been known to trip himself up occasionally.’</p> <p>The infamously private Mr Laws resigned from Government within weeks of taking office after he was found to have claimed expenses no-one knew he had claimed, to pay rent on a room no-one knew he rented, to a lover no-one knew he loved. He is said to be so secretive, not even he knows where he lives. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=9656#post-26142 Tue, 03 Aug 2010 10:44:40 +0000 ChrisHarrison 26142@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>The Government has today unveiled controversial plans to implement David Laws throughout England and Wales.</p> <p>Concerned parent groups have reacted with fury to the news. They say that the move could lead to their son or daughter unwittingly living next door to a politician.</p> <p>Puce-faced campaigner, Brian Bellows, of the Concerned Residents Against Pushy Politicians In North Gloucestershire, raged, ‘We work hard to live in this area, surrounded by good, honest people. The last thing we want is for a Member of Parliament coming round here, lowering house prices. And don’t think he won’t. I heard about a young boy in Yeovil, product of a broken home, say no more, used to flip his main residence between his mum and dad’s. Anyway, he went round his dad’s, asked for money for some football boots, Dad gave him £40; went back to his mum’s, asked for money for some football boots, she gave him £30; he went on eBay, got some boots for £20. He’s sixteen now and living in a penthouse flat overlooking the River Yeo. Are you trying to tell me that isn’t David Laws’ fault?!’</p> <p>Despite the concerns, police remain relaxed about the possibility of unprovoked attacks. Chief Constable Paul West of the Association of Chief Police Officers said, ‘We understand that parents might be worried about the prospect of David Laws coming to their neighbourhood, but we see no reason to suspect that this might lead to bloodshed. As far as we are aware, Mr Laws has no history of violence towards other people.’</p> <p>The infamously private Mr Laws resigned from Government within weeks of taking office after he was found to have claimed expenses no-one knew he had claimed, to pay rent on a room no-one knew he rented, to a lover no-one knew he loved. He is said to be so secretive, not even he knows where he lives.</p> <p>In the face of such uncertainty, Brian Bellows recommends parents organise themselves: ‘My wife and I heard a rumour about two years ago that Hazel Blears might move into our area. We started CRAPPING ourselves immediately and thank God she never arrived. If David Laws tries to come anywhere near our kids, we’ll be ready and I suggest other parents are too.’</p> <p>However, concerned citizens need not panic just yet. The Government’s plan will be subject to an impending trial. If the jury convicts Mr Laws of expenses fraud there may need to be a total rethink, with Communities Secretary, Eric Pickles, believed to possess all the natural attributes for the roll-out. </p>