http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=56216 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Wed, 19 Jun 2013 19:43:36 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=56216#post-162436 Tue, 12 Feb 2013 21:56:28 +0000 pinxit 162436@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Jonny, tell your better half to read the ineffable ullage you've trundled out.</p> <p>The mushroom grew out of his undercrackers, not his bonce.</p> <p>Mind you, if she'd commented on the asymmetrical nature of the smoke coming from his brain holes, she'd have had a point.</p> <p>Looking forward to the final 'clincher' punchline revision...</p> <p>* leans forward in squeaky Chesterfield and lights cheroot * </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=56216#post-162422 Tue, 12 Feb 2013 18:56:36 +0000 Jonny Shlep 162422@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nearly right Paddy. His enormous face is a great big joke and when he starts singing I want to gag him. ;)</p> <p>Loved the smudge btw Pinx. Absolute belter. I showed the missus however and she said "Hmmmm you think he'd have made it so that mushroom clouds were coming out of his ears wouldn't you"</p> <p>She's from South London you see :( </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=56216#post-162420 Tue, 12 Feb 2013 18:41:05 +0000 Paddy Berzinski 162420@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I don't get it. Is Olly Murs' great big face some kind of in joke, or running gag? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=56216#post-162414 Tue, 12 Feb 2013 18:28:16 +0000 Jonny Shlep 162414@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Ok lads, just got this feedback from the editor.</p> <p>Dear Mr Shlep</p> <p>Your skit today was without doubt the worst piece of copy it has ever been my misfortune to clap eyes on in over 67 years of editing and advanced megalomania. It was totally devoid of ingenuity, talent or humour.</p> <p>The ending however was quite magnificent. Poignant, well constructed, and extremely funny. Under no circumstances bow to any pressure to alter it, particularly from Pinxit who's just jealous of your ability to formulate wonderfully entertaining endings. Here's a cheque for £5,000. Now GET OUT! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=56216#post-162384 Tue, 12 Feb 2013 15:37:29 +0000 beau-jolly 162384@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Could you slip in a "Big Mac" and/or "going large" or is that connection too distracting? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=56216#post-162381 Tue, 12 Feb 2013 15:33:02 +0000 pinxit 162381@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Dear Kipper,</p> <p>Got you bang to rights chummy...</p> <p>You can have this <em><strong>ONLY</strong></em> if you change the punchline...</p> <p>Abberline</p> <p><img src="http://i830.photobucket.com/albums/zz223/pinxit2/tmc_airport_zpsd170c871.jpg"> </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=56216#post-162377 Tue, 12 Feb 2013 13:04:57 +0000 Jonny Shlep 162377@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Cheers lads. I agree the ending is a tad incongruous, it was merely a follow up to yesterday's skit about a council estate being built on Olly's extremely big face. His enormous dial just cries out to be parodied you see? ;)</p> <p>For the attention of Chief Inspector Pinxit of Scotland Yard.</p> <p>Dear Boss</p> <p>I've got a down on Murs and I wont stop ripping the piss out of him until he's knocked out of the charts by Justin Bieber. I love my work and want to start again. Catch me if you can copper.</p> <p>From hell!</p> <p>Saucy Jonny </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=56216#post-162325 Tue, 12 Feb 2013 09:14:05 +0000 rickwestwell 162325@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Love it. Agreed it needs a different punchline. Something about the US putting their fleet of intercontinental Frank Boughs on Def Con One, or something. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=56216#post-162324 Tue, 12 Feb 2013 08:20:17 +0000 pinxit 162324@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Chuckling like a good 'un until the punchline. </p> <p>Ya gotta get over this 'Life on Murs' schtick Jonny. Doesn't really fit with the brilliant Sir Macca set-up, does it?</p> <p>As it's a retaliatory move, how's about them massing on Fiona Bruce's hinterland?</p> <p>All imvho. =]</p> <p>Mad, bad, stars. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=56216#post-162323 Tue, 12 Feb 2013 07:51:50 +0000 Psycadelic Squirrel 162323@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Mental but I like it </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=56216#post-162322 Tue, 12 Feb 2013 07:05:48 +0000 Jonny Shlep 162322@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Western powers were on full alert last night amid fears that North Korea have conducted a nuclear test inside Sir Trevor McDonald's trousers.</p> <p>The ex-newsreader, now a respected documentary maker, is known to have been a communist sympathiser in his days at university and once travelled to Gdansk during the Polish uprising of the 1980s where he was heard loudly heckling iconic trades unionist, and anti soviet agitator, Lech Walensa at a street gathering of protesters.</p> <p>The test, which registered 5.7 on the Richter scale, is believed to have been carried out while McDonald 97 was sitting in the departure lounge at Chicago airport, waiting for a flight back to London following his recent, highly acclaimed, McDonald Inside Death Row, documentary series.</p> <p>A fellow traveller observed McDonald looking "agitated and preoccupied" and claimed that when he approached him for an autograph he got up without a word and went to the toilet. A few minutes later following his return, the same traveller heard a "dull crump", and noticed that McDonald's trousers had ballooned out at the front alarmingly.</p> <p>Peter Henson 35, a businessman from Brighton, Sussex, said "I realised at once that a nuclear test had taken place inside his trousers. He looked flustered and shifty and the lenses of his glasses were shattered from the concussive shock waves resulting from the blast"</p> <p>Last night in a clear warning to the Pyonyang government , South Korea have made what is seen as a retaliatory move by massing thousands of troops and heavy armour on Olly Murs' great big face. </p>