http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Fri, 24 May 2013 01:16:39 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-161192 Mon, 04 Feb 2013 22:27:08 +0000 button 161192@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thanks. Nice edit, I especially like the inclusion of Sheffield Wednesday (the only team to have a day of the week named after them) as a day of celebration.</p> <p>I can honestly say I'm really chuffed I made Mrs4fun laugh. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-161164 Mon, 04 Feb 2013 21:15:49 +0000 Perks 161164@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Good job button </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-161140 Mon, 04 Feb 2013 19:09:59 +0000 Squudge 161140@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>like </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-161122 Mon, 04 Feb 2013 17:15:36 +0000 One Line Only 161122@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nice one button! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-161120 Mon, 04 Feb 2013 17:13:02 +0000 dvo4fun 161120@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>A lovely NiB then button - even mrs4fun laughed </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-160993 Sun, 03 Feb 2013 19:12:40 +0000 charlies_hat 160993@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Yep, here's a Sunday evening bump! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-160927 Sat, 02 Feb 2013 23:30:30 +0000 Squudge 160927@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Like it - and would consider buying your chic chick panty pads<br /> ...they could be grouse pads when Easter is over too - but I wouldn't want to gild the lily.</p> <p>Headline is hard, but the every cliche helps thing sort of fits the crap holiday exploitation, or 'Every holiday helps' .... I wonder that the other supermarkets couldn't hit back with competing slogans. </p> <p>Co-op, 'good with fads' ...that sort of thing</p> <p>"our chef's special burgers..." very lovely</p> <p>...at the end of the 'bread and butter' bit, maybe 'let them eat (themed) cake'. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-160884 Sat, 02 Feb 2013 11:38:21 +0000 button 160884@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thanks Squudge, how's this (still not sure about a headline):</p> <p>In a surprising move set to shock the world of retail grocery, Tesco have announced they are to cease selling traditional foodstuffs, their bread and butter for many years, in favour of a full range of seasonal goods.</p> <p>Conventional aisles such as ‘Bakery’ and ‘Fresh Fruit &amp; Veg’ will be replaced with a range covering every holiday or event in the national calendar upon which they can cash in.</p> <p>Spokesman for the store Suzie Thorn told us “We had the idea after noticing that Easter products had been creeping into every aisle in the store, for instance our chick themed sanitary pads with yellow fluffy wings, and ‘Hot Cross Bum’ aloe vera toilet roll. </p> <p>The seasonal ranges offer customers the chance to stock up for all occasions, the new aisles will include offers such as the Mother’s day toilet cleaner range, Father’s Day Imodium plus, and half price tampons for rag week. On the meat counter, specially presented spatchcocked chickens on little wooden crucifixes for Good Friday, and our chef’s special burgers for the Grand National.</p> <p>We’re certain we know what our customers should be buying, and remember, there’s only 106 shopping days until Whitsun so stock up now with our Holy Spirits 2 for 1 special on Vodka and Rum.” </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-160872 Sat, 02 Feb 2013 10:45:29 +0000 Squudge 160872@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>You could change it to Tesco and have strapline 'Tesco - every little cliché!'<br /> ...goes well with your excellent idea of overt inappropriare holiday-event exploitation, and gives further vent for Jane Horrock's gratingly twee voice.</p> <p>You might suggest 'Mother's day toilet cleaner range' (with a special Harpic bottle for mothers-in-law), Father's day immodium-plus, and special tampons for Rag Week.</p> <p>On the meat counter, specially presented spatchcocked chickens on little wooden crucifixes for Easter (Good Friday, to be ecumenically correct), and burgers for the Grand National - natch.</p> <p>I could go on all day, but my doctor says not. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-160865 Sat, 02 Feb 2013 09:36:43 +0000 tonyhill 160865@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>How about pay the difference range </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-160859 Sat, 02 Feb 2013 08:56:40 +0000 Sinnick 160859@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Like it.</p> <p>Perhaps:<br /> Sainsbury's reveal new strapline "Live Less with Less" </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-160855 Sat, 02 Feb 2013 08:46:49 +0000 button 160855@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>You're right perks, I couldn't think of a headline. Any suggestions welcome.. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-160806 Sat, 02 Feb 2013 00:36:57 +0000 Perks 160806@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nice.</p> <p> I like the use of Try Something different in the headline but I don't think it explains the story enough. But in true style, I can't think of an alternative? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55622#post-160788 Fri, 01 Feb 2013 21:48:19 +0000 button 160788@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>In a surprising move set to shock the world of retail grocery, Sainsburys have today announced they are to cease selling traditional foodstuffs, their bread and butter for many years, in favour of a full range of seasonal goods.</p> <p>Conventional aisles such as ‘Bakery’ and ‘Fresh Fruit &amp; Veg’ will be replaced with a range covering every holiday or event in the national calendar upon which they can convince the cash strapped public to overspend on promotional essentials.</p> <p>Spokesman for the store Suzie Thorn told us “We had the idea after noticing that Easter products had been creeping into every aisle in the store, for instance chick themed sanitary pads with yellow fluffy wings, and ‘hot cross bum’ aloe vera toilet roll. Our seasonal ranges offer customers the chance to stock up for all occasions, the new aisles will include Valentines day, Pancake day, St Guinness Day, Easter, St George’s Day, School Holidays, Summer, Back to School, Halloween, Bonfire Night and Christmas. We’re certain we know what our customers should be buying, and remember, there’s only 107 shopping days until Whitsun, so stock up now with our Holy Spirits 2 for 1 special on Vodka and Rum.” </p>