http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55191 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Thu, 23 May 2013 22:56:03 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55191#post-159513 Wed, 23 Jan 2013 21:37:22 +0000 Ironduke 159513@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I'm pretty sure Richard Littlejohn has already proposed this in the Telegraph...independence for South-East England. I think he even named the aprty something too! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55191#post-159509 Wed, 23 Jan 2013 21:31:18 +0000 waylandsmithy 159509@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thanks for the comments but there's something wrong with this, it just doesn't work properly. Not sure what, think there's too many unconnected ideas. If I wasn't lazy, I'd rewrite it with the focus on Farage insisting on a referendum on leaving the continental shelf. If there is one, I only really got my head round oxbow lakes in geography. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55191#post-159502 Wed, 23 Jan 2013 21:00:39 +0000 sigmund 159502@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Take 5. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55191#post-159497 Wed, 23 Jan 2013 19:48:11 +0000 The All New Jeni B 159497@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Too close to the potential truth. I suspect you're actually a Whitehall mole Mr Smithy.</p> <p>Good work as always, but there's a typo in the second last line, "...didn't <em>bare</em> [sic]..."<br /> Unless of course there was nudity involved, in which case, as you were... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55191#post-159495 Wed, 23 Jan 2013 19:47:46 +0000 dvo4fun 159495@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Good from start to stop </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55191#post-159482 Wed, 23 Jan 2013 18:35:44 +0000 Perks 159482@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Although not the funniest bit, "Following a carefully uncontrolled fracking operation along its border with Devon, the newly independent state of Cornwall is now adrift in the Atlantic" had me laughing. lovely image </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55191#post-159472 Wed, 23 Jan 2013 17:49:17 +0000 waylandsmithy 159472@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Buoyed by the opportunity to make a knee-jerk exit from EU membership, voters in England are calling for the right to leave other well-established clubs that they’ve never had much interest in.</p> <p>With England currently committed to so many little hobbies such as the UK, NATO, the G8 and a loyalty scheme run by Tesco, the tired-looking nation is struggling to find time to watch the news, think rationally or read a paper. “If you ask me, we need to give it all up before we do our homework”, insisted the county of Oxon. “Why sleep-walk into a properly informed decision, when you could just go with the latent xenophobia?”</p> <p>Surrey and Middlesex admitted they were keen on dropping Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland, and wondered if they could also distance themselves from Birmingham and the scruffy bits of Guildford. But not every county sees a future in an isolated England. Following a carefully uncontrolled fracking operation along its border with Devon, the newly independent state of Cornwall is now adrift in the Atlantic.</p> <p>David Cameron has called for calm and promised to keep any debate on membership superficial. “Let’s not concentrate on the detail, but on how much we hate our neighbours”, he soothed. UKIP’s Nigel Farage welcomed the chance to ‘loathe locally’, “there’s always room to be more reactionary and insular”, he suggested. "But it works better from a distance, where you can lose all sense of perspective."</p> <p> Using a scale model of his New England, Farage explained how he would fire it into space. “Leaving the UK might be enough for the established parties, but it doesn’t go far enough. At UKIP, we’re committed to abandoning the entire continental shelf."</p> <p>Describing his plans as a ‘first step’ to an exit from the solar system and eventual Full Galaxial independence, Farage scoffed at suggestions his argument didn’t bear close scrutiny. “For too long we’ve skated endlessly around the Sun without really controlling our own destiny. What planet do these jokers think we're on?” </p>