http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Sat, 25 May 2013 13:15:15 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156447 Sat, 05 Jan 2013 14:02:22 +0000 dvo4fun 156447@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I liked the idea of V2s being "in service" </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156390 Sat, 05 Jan 2013 01:32:51 +0000 Quaz 156390@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Early V2s were prone to "airbursts", which is techy term for blowing up before they were meant to. They were then fitted with "Tin Trousers". Look it up, I'm not kidding. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156275 Fri, 04 Jan 2013 14:22:47 +0000 Midnight Dreary 156275@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>There's a great story in here - I love the idea of some nation re-arming under the guise of 'restoring' a whole load of rockets. Maybe Argentina, to be topical? Or have the population of Dresden responding to the restoration of WWII bombers by hastily 'restoring' an anti-aircraft battalion?</p> <p>Or maybe have the coalition getting in on the WWII restoration craze by restoring food shortages, rickets and poverty? </p> <p>Mind you, 'and no hydrogen' has made my day. </p> <p>Not to mention greasy bum sex. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156204 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 23:15:44 +0000 Yikes 156204@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Gets better by the minute!! All class!</p> <p>Could the last line be even more direct with 'fanal solution' ?? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156194 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 22:52:07 +0000 Idiot 156194@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>'...and no hydrogen' </p> <p>Class. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156193 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 22:47:45 +0000 ronseal 156193@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I like the idea.</p> <p>It's funny because there was a bloke on telly last who'd rebuilt a Lancaster Bomber...</p> <p>Oh, you saw it too.</p> <p>Could 'greasy bum sex' be saved for another story?</p> <p>It's good though. It will probably turn out to be a true story. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156191 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 22:42:56 +0000 Dawsons creek 156191@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>THanksfor this, I've upped it's ante and gone for a relaunch (rocket joke):</p> <p>Two brothers from Berlin with an interest in WW2 technology have successfully restored a V2 rocket. The projectile, powered by ethanol/water and a liquid oxygen oxidiser and no hydrogen, is fitted with a primitive guidance system and 200 (check this on Google) kilos of high(?) explosive. It could be the first one of its type to fly for nearly 70 years (please check: I don't think there are others in service).</p> <p>"We have worked on this project for several years now", said Klaus Horsch, "my brother Adolf and I really want to see one in the sky again." With the first and only flight scheduled to take place early next Thursday, it will be aimed roughly towards London where Klaus hopes it 'might hit a Jew'.</p> <p>Meanwhile two British brothers are planning to thwart their plans with a night raid, in a Lancaster they themselves have restored. "We hope to launch our attack under the cover of darkness", explained retired airman Johnny Hopstead. "We'll sneak into their own back yard maintaining radio silence, and disarm them with a session of greasy bum sex: I've heard they're working on the anal solution." </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156189 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 22:37:26 +0000 Idiot 156189@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>The totally unexpected 'greasy bum sex' bit at the end is one of the funniest things I've read on here in a long while, though I'm not sure it works within the context of the site. Who cares though - keep it up. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156188 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 22:34:06 +0000 Quaz 156188@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Sorry to be picky, but the V2 used Ethanol/water for fuel and Liquid oxygen for oxidiser. Just Saying, not Hydrogen. Now, the first stage of a Saturn 5, designed by many of the same people, used Kerosene and Oxygen, but I think that that the 2nd stage used liquid Hydrogen and Oxygen....I could go on all night. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156173 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 20:05:40 +0000 Dawsons creek 156173@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Beau, I was trying some Fruedien humor, based on rockets and bombers making subliminal anal solutions obvious in the minds eye but not on the page but then its there and the subconciously its very amusing. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156101 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 13:39:42 +0000 beau-jolly 156101@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Have to agree with everyone above. Was coming along nicely and then, Whoomph! Greasy bum sex. Where the f**k did that come from? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156088 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 13:12:32 +0000 Sinnick 156088@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I shouldn't like this but I do.</p> <p>The "bum sex" punchline isn't relevant to the story. The target of "jew" might work better as "synagogue", but I don't think either would offend</p> <p>You could add a line about matched funding from some right-wing organisation (I'm sure they still exist in Germany), or from the Austrian government who (I understand) doesn't keep it a secret.</p> <p>Good luck with expanding it. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156056 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 09:37:34 +0000 Gerontius 156056@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>You guys seem obsessed with anal intercourse.<br /> 'The ladies doth protest too much,methinks' </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156055 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 09:32:38 +0000 Squudge 156055@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I liked the idea, but wasn't sure about the ending or the 'hit a jew' bit in the middle.</p> <p>I'd have gone with a subtle modification along the lines of funding the endeavour by offering 'once in a lifetime' passenger trips (at this point you might consider dangerously satirising the anti-semitism thing with special discounts 'fur juden' - but I'd be a bit too chicken myself).</p> <p>The 'doctor Strangelove' experience would be offered complete with stetson and safety harness (the latter to ensure minimal risk of injury due to falling off during launch). Included in the costs are a series of beautifully mounted photographs taken of the lucky passenger throughout the various stages of deployment of the missile. These photographs will be presented to the family of the deceased framed in tasteful black MDF, fully showcasing the breathtaking scenery and expressions of joy.</p> <p>Truly this would be the experience of a lifetime. Targets are available on a first-come first-served basis, and unfortunately, Gosport, Hull and Ventnor sold out within hours of advertising. Book early to avoid disappointment!</p> <p>I could have fun all day with this but you get the idea. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156052 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 09:20:06 +0000 Yikes 156052@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>This is weird enough for me to thoroughly like it!</p> <p>As the others say might be good to think of another punchline ... I'm too zonked to offer any suggestions ... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156051 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 09:15:32 +0000 Dick Everyman 156051@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Like it. There's some holocaustic wit in there but I don't think bum sex should be the final solution. How about a knob gag with a reference to a German helmet? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156023 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 23:05:22 +0000 Dawsons creek 156023@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Oh, I bet that's what I was thinking about. My psychologist would have a field Marshall. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156022 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 23:03:18 +0000 Tripod 156022@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p><blockquote>anal solutions</blockquote></p> <p>Hmmm... I always thought it was 'final solution'... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156021 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 23:00:50 +0000 Dawsons creek 156021@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>You might have point, butt a session of man love will bring an end to hostilities.</p> <p>Why would you drink anti shave? Is this a bad idea or whatnot?</p> <p>If you don't like the bumming end, I suppose someone could restore an armistice? Did they have it, at the ww2? I bet they at least thought about anal solutions. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156020 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 22:53:10 +0000 waylandsmithy 156020@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I like the idea of this, a V2 does make restoring a Lancaster bomber seem like a daft thing to do.</p> <p>My only criticism would be the punchline: are you sure this is best finished off with a reference to anal intercourse? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156018 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 22:48:24 +0000 Tripod 156018@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Been drinking after-shave again? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54067#post-156017 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 22:44:47 +0000 Dawsons creek 156017@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Two brothers from Berlin with an interest in WW2 technology have successfully restored a V2 rocket. The projectile, which features hydrogen power, a primitive guidance system and 200 kilos of high explosive, could be the first one of its type to fly for nearly 70 years.</p> <p>"We have worked on this project for several years now", said Klaus Horsch, "my brother Adolf and I really want to see one in the sky again." With the first and only flight scheduled to take place early next Thursday, it will be aimed roughly towards London where Klaus hopes it 'might hit a Jew'.</p> <p>Meanwhile two British brothers are planning to thwart their plans with a night raid, in a Lancaster they themselves have restored. "We hope to launch our attack under the cover of darkness", explained retired airman Johnny Hopstead. "We'll sneak into their own back yard maintaining radio silence, and disarm them with a session of greasy bum sex." </p>