http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54057 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Sat, 25 May 2013 20:09:07 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54057#post-156212 Fri, 04 Jan 2013 00:30:55 +0000 The All New Jeni B 156212@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>And as if by magic, this pops up on the BBC local news feed...<br /> (Forfar is about 20miles from here)<br /> <a href="http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-20905952">Get orrfff my forklift...</a> </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54057#post-156105 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 14:00:15 +0000 beau-jolly 156105@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Jeni, we often have tractors in our pub car park; some as big as a house. I bloody love watching some London tosser proudly park his Range Rover and then cower in the shadow of young Tom Carter's combine as he does a hand brake skid into the next space. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54057#post-156062 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 10:19:17 +0000 allmyownstunts 156062@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Midfield, doesn't the bus version of that tale have this add-on: Hamish and Iain break into Inverness bus depot to take said bus home to Fortrose. But Hamish can't find a bus that has 'Fortrose' on the front. 'don't worry,' says Iain after some anxious pondering, 'we'll take one that says Avoch and walk the rest of the way.' </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54057#post-156002 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 19:55:27 +0000 The All New Jeni B 156002@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>For some reason, JCBs are popular vehicles to steal around here too dvo.<br /> It used to be Mk II Ford Fiestas because they could be opened and started with any Ford key, or Yale key for that matter, but the neds have moved on to bigger things.</p> <p>Tractors are still regularly driven home by very pissed young farmer types, and every few months the local carpark has more than a few Massey Fergusons parked up while their owners get blootered. It always makes for interesting chats. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54057#post-156000 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 19:51:50 +0000 dvo4fun 156000@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Gave me some chuckles squudge. </p> <p>One of my first 'supervisees' was an oik who'd twocked a JCB. I'd liked to have been there when the victim was reporting the crime "Oh yes sir, and what colours was it?" </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54057#post-155993 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 18:31:10 +0000 The All New Jeni B 155993@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>In these parts it's a tractor.</p> <p>And I'm not joking. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54057#post-155989 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 18:02:22 +0000 Midfield Diamond 155989@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>The version I heard involved a bus, not a taxi. But it's a good one. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54057#post-155987 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 17:50:27 +0000 Squudge 155987@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>not wholly original, but wanted to share.</p> <p>...been off for a while because my funny was unwell </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54057#post-155984 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 17:39:03 +0000 Dick Everyman 155984@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Boom boom! Welcome back Squudge ;0) </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54057#post-155983 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 17:33:28 +0000 Squudge 155983@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>A sobering story, from a friend.</p> <p>I would like to share an experience with you about drinking and driving.</p> <p>As everyone knows, some of us have been lucky not to have had brushes with the authorities on our way home from various social sessions over the years. As an example, a few nights ago I was out for a few drinks with some friends, had a few too many beers and then topped it off with a margarita. Not a good idea. Knowing full well I was at least slightly over the limit, I did something I've never done before. I took a taxi home. As luck would have it, I encountered a police road block, but because it was a taxi, the police waved it through.</p> <p>I arrived home safely without incident, which was quite fortunate, considering that I have never driven a taxi before and have no idea where I got it. </p>