Forum » Topic: Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue

Forum » Topic: Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Thu, 20 Jun 2013 11:53:33 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 <![CDATA[Search]]> q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php Gerontius on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-156058 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 09:52:24 +0000 Gerontius 156058@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Yep, looks good. dvo4fun on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-156034 Thu, 03 Jan 2013 06:05:44 +0000 dvo4fun 156034@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ cracking FP Dick Gerontius on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-155978 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 17:07:33 +0000 Gerontius 155978@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Actually, nine months is not bad for Darlaston. Sometimes it can feel like you've been in that queue forever. Midfield Diamond on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-155957 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 15:30:24 +0000 Midfield Diamond 155957@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Never been and never intend to, but thought this sub was very good despite my lack of familarity with the subject. Stars. pinxit on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-155932 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 10:49:48 +0000 pinxit 155932@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ All babies conceived in an Ikea bed come out in kit form with missing instructions and allen key. Fact. Call it Allen. Stars. dvo4fun on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-155922 Wed, 02 Jan 2013 08:51:46 +0000 dvo4fun 155922@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ One visit was enough for me. However, I encountered an IKEA/Burmuda Triangle effect just driving past the Milton Keynes branch on Monday. Managed to get lost even with the SatNav set to max and very clear road signage. Something kept sucking me back towards the IKEA roundabout. Bastards. Oh and good sub Vertically Challenged Giant on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-155919 Tue, 01 Jan 2013 23:22:16 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 155919@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Lovely stuff Dick Everyman on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-155918 Tue, 01 Jan 2013 23:18:28 +0000 Dick Everyman 155918@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Like it Wayland! Too late to edit myself but maybe the nice admin lady may have a word with Ed if it gets used. waylandsmithy on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-155916 Tue, 01 Jan 2013 22:55:02 +0000 waylandsmithy 155916@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ I'm not sure the staff at IKEA would be that helpful. "The staff tried to help with the birth but kept insisting Helena had definitely got all the bits necessary for a baby, when it was obvious we were short of a leg and a foot", explained David. "The manager wanted us to come back for those later but I wasn't making another bloody trip. Eventually an assistant found what we were looking for, after a quick root around in Helena's Fäni." Yikes on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-155905 Tue, 01 Jan 2013 20:40:48 +0000 Yikes 155905@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Very nice Dick! Dick Everyman on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-155895 Tue, 01 Jan 2013 18:24:17 +0000 Dick Everyman 155895@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Thanks guys - you've probably guessed IKEA's my favourite place for wasting time... jimmydodger on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-155887 Tue, 01 Jan 2013 17:12:23 +0000 jimmydodger 155887@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Another winner from you, Dick! I scanned the New Year's honours list for services to humour...where were you? custard cream on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-155886 Tue, 01 Jan 2013 17:04:13 +0000 custard cream 155886@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Brilliant as usual! Loved the IKEA names which is just one of the infuriating things abouth them. Dick Everyman on "Woman gives birth and raises child in IKEA queue" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54029#post-155884 Tue, 01 Jan 2013 15:58:16 +0000 Dick Everyman 155884@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ A Darlaston woman has given birth and started to raise her first child while waiting in line at IKEA. After Helena Churchill and partner David Lomax loaded their shopping trolley with their bargain Sniglar Cot they headed to the checkout where they were surprised to see 15 aisles with an average of 125 customers waiting to pay. “At first I said to David, let’s just leave the trolley behind and come back on another day. But he insisted that we wait saying it wouldn’t take too long.” The couple then joined different queues in an attempt to get to the tills more quickly, but to no avail. It was then that Helena’s water’s broke and she delivered a 9lb baby boy after ten hours in labour. Now, almost nine months later he is taking his first steps towards the check out. “He’s developing very quickly,” said Helena “He’s got a lovely collection of Klappar Cirkus toys and the staff here have been very good helping us to assemble his own little nursery right here in the queue.” IKEA’s own in-store health visitor has however raised concerns over his diet of Godis Skum marshmallows and Kycklingbullar Med Ost chicken meatballs with cheese. Fellow shopper, Craig O’Brien who helped to clean up at the birth with his new Lödder mop and Hären bath towel said, “I’m delighted that Helena and Brian have asked me to be godfather to little Glögg. But I am really looking forward to getting home to my partner Adam sometime in the near future. In fact I’m hoping that gay marriage may be legalised by the time we all get out as I’d like them both to be guests of honour at our wedding.”