http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Sat, 25 May 2013 13:22:18 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-156962 Wed, 09 Jan 2013 09:24:03 +0000 DrTurmoil 156962@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thanks all! I'll tag you in the next unflattering picture of a bunch of drunk people I post. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-156946 Wed, 09 Jan 2013 08:27:28 +0000 charlies_hat 156946@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Perfect. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-156945 Wed, 09 Jan 2013 08:01:50 +0000 pinxit 156945@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Wow. Rivulets of vitriol seep out of every pixel pore. Sorry I missed this before.</p> <p>The 'healthcare worker' denouement thumped into my solar plexus and left me on the canvas.</p> <p>Brilliantly written.</p> <p>I've put you last on my people to 'Poke' list.</p> <p>'Like' ( A lot) </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-156910 Tue, 08 Jan 2013 22:38:41 +0000 Squudge 156910@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>oopsie bump</p> <p>...love the cockwittery </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-156907 Tue, 08 Jan 2013 21:55:36 +0000 rikkor 156907@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I like it. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-156859 Tue, 08 Jan 2013 16:47:18 +0000 Perks 156859@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Late stars and a free bump.</p> <p>Very good. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-156799 Tue, 08 Jan 2013 10:47:58 +0000 Boutros 156799@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Oh have some more stars, and well bumped. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-156794 Tue, 08 Jan 2013 10:22:43 +0000 DrTurmoil 156794@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I know bumping old stuff causes a bit of controversy round these parts. But it's 2013 now and this problem sadly isn't going away. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-153259 Thu, 13 Dec 2012 20:29:33 +0000 writinginbsl 153259@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>oooooooooooohhhhhh</p> <p>lovely</p> <p>stars </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-153208 Thu, 13 Dec 2012 15:30:32 +0000 DrTurmoil 153208@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thank you -- I should probably add that any resemblance to any person living or dead is entirely unintentional. Even if they do take photos of their food as if cooking a plate of pasta is a major frigging achievement. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-153205 Thu, 13 Dec 2012 15:08:44 +0000 The All New Jeni B 153205@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Have you been stalking me and my string of increasingly ranty status updates?</p> <p>Many <strike>likes</strike> stars. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-153204 Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:59:40 +0000 DrTurmoil 153204@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>And you can fuck off as well.</p> <p>Sorry, sorry. Had a bit of rage left over there. </p> <p>Thank you, I mean. I feel much better now. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-153203 Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:45:57 +0000 waylandsmithy 153203@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Harsh, angry and great. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53180#post-153200 Thu, 13 Dec 2012 14:00:04 +0000 DrTurmoil 153200@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>27-year-old Stephanie Crowe from Harlow has seen all feelings of warmth and friendship for childhood pal Ben Simms corrode into disdain, disgust and hatred due to his incessant inane and pompous Facebook updates.</p> <p>"I've known Ben since I was eight, and have always enjoyed a trip to the pub with him. But ever since I've been looking at his Facebook page I can't even look at him face to face without wanting to glass the up-his-own-arse fucker. See how he'd like to 'share' checking in to local A&amp;E with 314 of his closest friends and family."</p> <p>Simm's offences are said to include expressing pseudo-sincere concern for repressed bloggers in countries he couldn't even locate on a Lonely Planet Places I Pretend I'd love to Visit One Day app, posting iPhone photos of "well, anything", and taking football news from BBC Sport much too seriously. </p> <p>But most of Crowe's venom is reserved for the updates that express Simm's love and admiration for his wife. "Yes they may well have gone to the Fat Duck, but he neglected to mention they only went to try and patch things up after she shagged the barman at her local karaoke. He didn't mention he hasn't been able to get it up for two year's either, which might explain a few things and all."</p> <p>But Crowe is not restricting her bile to people on Facebook she knows well, identifying a much wider circle of Facebook friends who cause her pelvic floor to tighten in fury and disgust. "Vague acquaintances who think they're an intellectual match for Stephen Fucking Fry because they know some basic grammar and can spot when some other halfwit has used it incorrectly, they can fuck right off. Oh and Stephen Fucking Fry too, but that's more of a Twitter loathing, and I don't really want to get distracted from the cockwittery of Facebook users. And their pets. Their stupid, stupid fucking pets."</p> <p>When suggested to Crowe that much of the rage in her life could be alleviated by simply not using the social network, the 27-year-old healthcare worker sighed and admitted that she's not sure there's an aspect of her personality left that isn't fed by the hatred of others on the internet. </p> <p>"Sometimes the only thing that keeps me going is the idea that one day I'll see that fanny-dribble Simms' profile frozen as an In Memoriam page," she confessed, "Stephanie will really fucking like that." </p>