http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Thu, 20 Jun 2013 07:16:11 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152765 Mon, 10 Dec 2012 04:37:32 +0000 Squudge 152765@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I don't care if it has been done before - it reminds me of my own personal dream to win an obscene amount and revel in it.</p> <p>Change me - you bet. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152741 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 23:46:32 +0000 malgor 152741@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p><a href="http://www.newsbiscuit.com/2012/08/03/money-buys-man-immense-happiness-176/">Money buys man immense happiness</a> - Team Biscuit. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152738 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 23:35:15 +0000 medici2471 152738@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p><blockquote>go to restaurants with cutlery</blockquote></p> <p>A rare LOL ***** </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152734 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 23:24:46 +0000 Username 152734@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nice. 5 </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152727 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 22:51:07 +0000 Perks 152727@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nice one. I think it may have been a ticker at some point but this stands on its own merit </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152723 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 22:10:00 +0000 Tripod 152723@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p><blockquote>You'll never win with that attitude.</blockquote></p> <p>I don't play the lottery, so I'm already up £1 every week... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152720 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 22:04:19 +0000 waylandsmithy 152720@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>You'll never win with that attitude. I'm pretty sure you're hoping all wrong. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152718 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 22:00:17 +0000 The All New Jeni B 152718@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Yeah, more than likely, but to be honest, when you're skint enough to actually fervently hope for even a small lottery win just to get you out of a hole, you don't want to rock the boat by hoping for too much. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152713 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 21:55:11 +0000 Tripod 152713@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p><blockquote>But if you pray for a win that just covers the bills, and then you win just enough to do that, you're going to kick yourself for lowering your sights, surely? </blockquote></p> <p>Well, yes, it'll turn out badly either way. Which is why I've put one of my kidneys on eBay... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152711 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 21:53:20 +0000 dvo4fun 152711@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Knew someone in the Lottery early days who scooped about £140,000 or so. Not nearly enough to tell his boss to poke his job and buy a matching set of Italian motorcycles but it obviously seemed something he wanted to do. Other than that I don't think he went mad and it lasted around a year I think. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152710 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 21:52:37 +0000 waylandsmithy 152710@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>But if you pray for a win that just covers the bills, and then you win just enough to do that, you're going to kick yourself for lowering your sights, surely? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152707 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 21:47:55 +0000 The All New Jeni B 152707@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Tripod, I know that feeling. I went from hoping for the full ginormous monty, to bartering down.<br /> "Dear lottery fairy, please please please let me win the £100+ million Euro rollover...<br /> Dear lottery fairy, just the millionaire's raffle would be excellent...<br /> Dear lottery fairy, just a couple of grand would really help...<br /> Dear lottery fairy, can I have just enough to make sure I can pay my bills..." </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152705 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 21:43:56 +0000 button 152705@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Its new to me, and a great idea </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152699 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 21:38:45 +0000 dvo4fun 152699@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>It rang some bell - or that may have been the dinner gong. Stars aplenty though. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152697 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 21:35:45 +0000 Psycadelic Squirrel 152697@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Yep like it. If I won the lottery I'd probably be dead within a month. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152696 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 21:35:08 +0000 Tripod 152696@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Some number cruncher must have worked out what the optimum lottery win might be: ie to change the winner's life for better, not worse. A hundred grand, to pay off the mortgage? A million, to buy that dream house? Ten million, for a life of leisure? For me, right this minute, it would be £200... so I don't get my electricity cut off... Oh, and maybe a bit more, to reverse that vasectomy... And the car's on its last legs... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152694 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 21:24:51 +0000 The All New Jeni B 152694@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Can't say I do, but also have a feeling it has to have been done.</p> <p>It's another good piece though.</p> <p>I've always wondered why people bother buying lottery tickets if they don't plan on letting a big win change them. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152692 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 21:21:21 +0000 waylandsmithy 152692@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I'm sure this must have been done, but I can't find it anywhere. Anyone remember anything like this? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=53019#post-152679 Sun, 09 Dec 2012 20:59:57 +0000 waylandsmithy 152679@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>A resident of Arizona who won $500 million in the ‘Powerball Lottery’ has claimed he is ‘looking forward’ to the money changing him completely. </p> <p>Chuck Sanders has been employed as a shelf supervisor at the Tucson branch of Wal-Mart for the past decade, and also works as a volunteer at a local shelter for the homeless. But following his win, Sanders has sworn to ‘fuck that shit right off’ and spend more of his time on a gold-plated yacht, snorting cocaine off the breasts of high-class prostitutes.</p> <p>“I’ve had to tolerate the same small group of morons since junior school”, explained Sanders. “It’s a close-knit community, but it’s also a shit one.” Sanders can’t wait to meet a new raft of wealthier friends, who have better teeth and go to restaurants with cutlery. Sanders has fond memories of the simple, homely bar he used to socialise in, and how he bought it for cash and converted into an animal research laboratory.</p> <p>Before the remarkable win, Sanders considered himself the sort of ‘regular joe’ who had to resort to doing charity work to convince even the plainest of women to sleep with him. But with a cool half a billion in the bank and a publicist to keep his face in the papers, Sanders can now enjoy being ‘a total ass-hat’ and still have supermodels throw themselves at him.</p> <p>“It’s amazing how my life’s turned out”, declared Sanders. “When I was 13, I could only dream of being so shallow and materialistic. Me and my friends would play games where we’d pretend to sneer at the poor but fortunately, that was a dream that only came true for me.”</p> <p>Sanders hasn’t completely forgotten his former acquaintances, and still takes the time to phone them from exotic locations. “Keeping up with the time zones can be a headache, which is why I now employ a personal horologist”, he explained. “With his expertise I’m always confident that I’m ringing them at precisely 3.30 am.”</p> <p>Thanks to liposuction, rhinoplasty and injections of panda bile, Sanders’ former neighbours might hardly recognise him, if it weren’t for the billboards he’s erected. But one aspect of his life has remained unchanged, and Sanders has vowed to continue buying a weekly lottery ticket. As he explained, “if I win for a second time, I won’t let it change me one bit. As I was saying to Trump at one of our little get-togethers last night, I’m relatively content with my lot.” </p>