http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=51963 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Thu, 23 May 2013 21:31:16 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=51963#post-149776 Wed, 21 Nov 2012 07:55:10 +0000 Midfield Diamond 149776@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>C'mon Biscuiteers, you're not going to put up with that are you? Gerontius has poked you very hard with a sharp shitty stick. The way to get back at him is not to add juvenile tags; that just proves his point. No, the way to rub his nose in it is to submit a funny, witty, original, well-written piece for this week's Neat-O: </p> <p><a href="http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=51902" rel="nofollow">http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=51902</a></p> <p>As if Gerontius needs any more encouragement, I think I have 10 entries so far on the subject of Intelligence. Beau-Jolly had more than double that for the subject of Real Ale. I fear that says far too much ...</p> <p>Right, off to check the Neat-O rules to see if an inward-looking piece of barbed, sarcastic bile should be disqualified on the grounds that it could be having a pop at me. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=51963#post-149676 Tue, 20 Nov 2012 12:54:27 +0000 waylandsmithy 149676@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Bloody brilliant. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=51963#post-149669 Tue, 20 Nov 2012 12:45:35 +0000 Tripod 149669@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p><blockquote>Gaza/Gazza homophone</blockquote></p> <p>I could barely get a tune out of mine... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=51963#post-149665 Tue, 20 Nov 2012 12:42:47 +0000 Nowherefast 149665@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Hands up to slipping over the line myself and being guilty as charged. I too have been noticing an increasing tendency of submissions shifting towards one line gags rather than thought provoking satirical comment (As I say hands up to being guilty as charged, partly due to being too lazy to develop notions into full subs, partly due to ideas that I've mused on for a day or two and worked out in my head disappearing as soon as I role my sleeves up to try and get them written down)</p> <p>Anyway.. kudos for having the wherewithal to satirically slap us all on the wrist. Point well taken. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=51963#post-149646 Tue, 20 Nov 2012 09:41:51 +0000 Dick Everyman 149646@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Most of my stuff is embryonic - unlike others who give birth to brilliant satire like this! Have 5 swinging cot stars baby! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=51963#post-149644 Tue, 20 Nov 2012 09:33:39 +0000 Yikes 149644@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Only 4 stars because of the misspelling of Savile's name. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=51963#post-149620 Tue, 20 Nov 2012 08:46:55 +0000 Gerontius 149620@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Children as young as 5-6 years old are turning their back on satirical humour and going off in search of something more challenging warned Kay Benbow, Head of Control at CBeebies<br /> Regular viewers of toddler TV have complained that the satire on some popular websites has reached such mind numbing peurility that watching the mobiles hovering above their cots can often offer a more rewarding challenge.<br /> But are the toddlers right asks former funny man Jack Dee?<br /> ‘Yes, I think so’ argued Benbow ‘it’s one thing filling a nappy with utter shite but these toddlers don’t wont to fill their heads with it too.<br /> Give them a bit of credit, five year olds are more intelligent than that’.<br /> But with more and more satirists seemingly pitching their work at the lucrative pre-school market, Benbow warned that infantile comedy websites that can ‘barely challenge the intelligence of a gestating embryo’ are here to stay.<br /> And with some contributors still thinking there is mileage left in the excrutiating Gaza/Gazza homophone, many observers agree the toddlers may have a point.<br /> ‘These satirists are going to have to up their game if they wan’t to hold a cold sober toddler’s attention for more than 30 seconds’ warned Benbow ‘don’t forget most under-fives are in bed by six, not poleaxed on the sofa buried under a mountain of empty lager cans.....they’ve never even seen Mock the Week so it’s no good satirists thinking they can still rely on that hackneyed old formula to get by’.<br /> But the satirists hit back by pointing out their work still attracts favourable comments from fellow contributors and is nearly always rewarded with a five-star rating within seconds of being posted on-line.<br /> ‘So that proves we ARE still funny no matter what these critics say’ said one satirist, hastily posting his 30th Jimmy Saville ticker of the day before it popped out of his head ‘those little yellow stars prove just how funny we satirists really are, so you can tell those under-fives they can just go and fuck right off.<br /> If they think they can do any better then let them try.<br /> Oh....really...DarkBill’s only 4 1/2....shit’. </p>