http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47822 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Mon, 20 May 2013 17:35:10 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47822#post-137562 Mon, 10 Sep 2012 23:37:22 +0000 Sir Lupus 137562@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>thanks guys! I've had a go at reworking with David Laws etc, altho I fear I've missed the reshuffle story boat now. Fun anyway.... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47822#post-137360 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 22:17:10 +0000 Squudge 137360@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I particularly enjoyed: 'Jo Smith of the Campaign Against Driving With Your Eyes Shut'</p> <p>I gave it 5 </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47822#post-137359 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 22:14:01 +0000 Yikes 137359@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Looks like a nice NiB candidate as is! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47822#post-137356 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 21:43:00 +0000 Squudge 137356@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I reckon you are spot on with a one-line reference.<br /> I wouldn't like to detract focus from the best bits on Mr Burns. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47822#post-137354 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 21:16:31 +0000 Sir Lupus 137354@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Good idea! Have passed the "edit window" now, but something like this added on as a quote from Asil Nadir's lawyers:</p> <p>"After all, if David Laws is fit to be in government, who isn't?"</p> <p>or, alternatively, a whole new story dealing with all the almost-unsatirisable aspects of these 2 gentlemens' career paths. but that sounds like hard work... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47822#post-137310 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 09:10:32 +0000 Squudge 137310@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>One wonders if you could shoehorn in a snippet re David Laws appointment to education, and implications for tuition on economics, maths and ethics. Not forgetting his 'roving brief for coalition policy'.</p> <p>How DO we allow re-appointment of people convicted of fiddling public money? (just curious) </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47822#post-137277 Fri, 07 Sep 2012 21:53:34 +0000 Sir Lupus 137277@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Cheers. NiB would be splendid </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47822#post-137267 Fri, 07 Sep 2012 20:39:04 +0000 FlashArry 137267@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nice piece - and like the style. Could make a NiB ? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47822#post-137265 Fri, 07 Sep 2012 20:10:20 +0000 Sir Lupus 137265@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>this is a bit long but I'm sure some of the people on here can mine some comedy gold (or at least, say, zinc) out of it. Just wanted to get something on about Mr Burns, who seems a too good (or bad) to miss character. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47822#post-137264 Fri, 07 Sep 2012 20:03:31 +0000 Sir Lupus 137264@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>While many have been baffled as to how David Cameron could appoint someone convicted of careless driving as Transport Minister, the explanation has now emerged: Simon Burns is simply working out the term of his community service sentence. </p> <p>“I’m a firm believer in the punishment fitting the crime” said Mr Burns, speaking on his phone from the fast lane of the M11. “So, having critically injured someone, naturally I first became junior Health Minister. Then, as I did this by running over a cyclist, Transport was the logical next step.”</p> <p>Jo Smith of the Campaign Against Driving With Your Eyes Shut commented “We were concerned that this appointment and indeed his sentence - £400 or one day’s salary - seemed rather lenient for breaking someone’s neck by driving into him coming out of a car park, no matter how difficult it is to see when the pavement is crowded. But now I realise that he has to work long hours reading civil service briefing papers for only £100k a year, we are much reassured”.</p> <p>Other lawbreakers are trying to use this case to establish a precedent have met with mixed results. A Mr B Racer was unsuccessful in his attempt to have his speeding fine reduced to one day’s worth of Job Seeker’s Allowance and a job as a traffic warden. However, lawyers for convicted fraudster Asil Nadir say they are “optimistic” that they can get his 10 year jail term commuted into employment as an advisor to the Chancellor of the Exchequer. </p>