http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Wed, 19 Jun 2013 16:04:02 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134622 Tue, 14 Aug 2012 13:38:23 +0000 JohnA 134622@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>My boss tells me I'm good for the high jump. How would he know? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134609 Tue, 14 Aug 2012 09:18:55 +0000 Midnight Dreary 134609@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I believe Dogging is a demonstration sport next time. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134601 Tue, 14 Aug 2012 08:21:39 +0000 godly1966 134601@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Luckily there’s only a women’s team. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134562 Mon, 13 Aug 2012 21:36:59 +0000 Sinnick 134562@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Men's or women's ? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134544 Mon, 13 Aug 2012 14:20:43 +0000 godly1966 134544@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I’ve decided to offer my services to the synchronised swimmer’s, I have come up with a great way for them to practice holding there breath. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134138 Thu, 09 Aug 2012 10:42:24 +0000 beau-jolly 134138@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Godly; That's it! As far as I can see the coach doesn't have to be fit at all. He just needs to have a 1970s moustache and hairstyle. Also the girls do what ever he tells them to (see Olga Korbut) </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134128 Thu, 09 Aug 2012 09:34:07 +0000 The All New Jeni B 134128@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Multiple Melting Ice-Cream Carrying.</p> <p>Shopping Bag Lifting.</p> <p>Avoiding Eye Contact on Public Transport.</p> <p>Obnoxious Child Breeding. (Although the Americans are strong contenders.)</p> <p>Tutting. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134127 Thu, 09 Aug 2012 09:32:38 +0000 The All New Jeni B 134127@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Rhythmic Queuing.</p> <p>Synchronised Apologising.</p> <p>Beach Hot-Sand Running. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134121 Thu, 09 Aug 2012 09:17:09 +0000 riesler 134121@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Synchronised trying-to-get-past-someone-in-a-corridor. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134120 Thu, 09 Aug 2012 09:16:35 +0000 riesler 134120@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Lounging by the pool. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134109 Thu, 09 Aug 2012 08:16:31 +0000 godly1966 134109@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>You don’t need to be an athlete, become a coach. I’ve offered my services to the female rowers and beach volley ball teams. If that fails why not doggy dancing they have dressage (horse dancing) don’t they. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134061 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 22:10:03 +0000 Gerontius 134061@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Laying the table-tennis.<br /> You have to get the doilleys and cutlery in the right order....one misplaced soup spoon and it's four penalty faults. Get the salt &amp; pepper in the wrong order and you're disqualified. Yes, it's tough...but this is the Olympics. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134048 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 18:59:32 +0000 bonjonelson 134048@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>With Maddie and Lord Lucan, we can certainly put out a strong Hide and Seek team </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134043 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 18:45:59 +0000 Actual Size 134043@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I reckon I could ride that moped in the velodrome and put enough petrol in to challenge for a medal or failing that - extreme grouting or jumping to conclusions. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134006 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 13:25:41 +0000 Psycadelic Squirrel 134006@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Where do I sign up? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134004 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 13:08:19 +0000 beau-jolly 134004@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Phew! I followed a link and then another and suddenly there I was in the dark side; Thigh deep among the pro-celebrity squirrel lickers of the beta version. I just managed to back-space my way out before the "real" world slipped away for ever. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-134001 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 13:02:09 +0000 bonjonelson 134001@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I assume Badger Fisting isn't on the 2016 roster </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-133998 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 12:46:42 +0000 beau-jolly 133998@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I don't know why I forgot this but many years ago and after only a hour or so's training I came in Silver medal position in the Rutland all-comers pidgeon plucking competition. (No, honestly that bit is true!) With 4 years training I recon' I could strip the little buggers of their feathers in the blink of an eye. A small step to licking squirels but no oven-ready game as a by-product.</p> <p>Cat dressage? Hmmmm. I think under-water soot juggling may be easier. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-133988 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 11:45:36 +0000 The All New Jeni B 133988@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>May I remind you all of the Team GB Squirrel-Licking squad?</p> <p>As coach, I'm always on the lookout for new talent, and although a certain degree of speed and agility is required, age is no barrier.</p> <p>Details of our fantastic sport are available through the NB search facility. Anyone interested in coming along for a taster session should let me know.... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-133983 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 11:12:32 +0000 butagirl 133983@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>For some reason, "cat dressage" had me giggling like a lunatic. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-133979 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 10:40:43 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 133979@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I've taken up rowing having been inspired by the GB woman who won gold despite only starting the sport 4 years ago. I'm training in my local by drinking massive amounts of stella and rowing with anybody that looks at me funny.</p> <p>I reckon by the time Rio 2016 comes around I'll be a world class rower able to argue with the best of them. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-133969 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 10:17:13 +0000 Stan Laurel 133969@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Cat dressage. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-133968 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 10:07:28 +0000 Nowherefast 133968@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Synchronised Channel Surfing .. Mastering the average TV/STB remote has become a very challenging pastime. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-133966 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 10:04:17 +0000 tedweasel 133966@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>We have an eight man synchronised drinking team in Ilkley and despite training for over 30 hours a week we receive no funding from the Lottery.<br /> We've written to the IOC but, as yet, no reply. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46558#post-133960 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 09:35:42 +0000 beau-jolly 133960@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Inspired by the heroics of London 2012 I started to think what I could do which would take 4 years training and get me a <strike>free holiday</strike> place at Rio 2016. Then I realised that I would be damn near 60 by then. Even the small bores are younger than that.<br /> Any suggested sports? Anyone else suitably insired to come to Rio with me? What sport will you be doing? </p>