Forum » Topic: Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?

Forum » Topic: Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways? http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Tue, 21 May 2013 10:33:43 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 <![CDATA[Search]]> q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php Perks on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-135230 Mon, 20 Aug 2012 20:01:17 +0000 Perks 135230@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ nice L.A. Good Job The All New Jeni B on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-135209 Mon, 20 Aug 2012 18:11:01 +0000 The All New Jeni B 135209@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Oooh! Didn't even notice. Thanks dvo. dvo4fun on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-135181 Mon, 20 Aug 2012 09:32:51 +0000 dvo4fun 135181@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Lovely left alert chaps. Max starrage fully justified custard cream on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133834 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 11:03:19 +0000 custard cream 133834@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Excellent, max. stars! The All New Jeni B on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133828 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 10:33:40 +0000 The All New Jeni B 133828@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Quaz, stop doing that other managerial trick of passing the buck. You know fine that the Evil Island thing was due to the Evil Henchmen's Union. Anyway, I'm hoping to 'acquire' one of those new subs that are disguised as Orca. Gerry, you're right. He's a lazy bugger that one, thinks that having the keys to the "Junior Executive Washroom" means he can hide in there and skive. Gerontius on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133788 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 05:43:13 +0000 Gerontius 133788@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Nice sub Quaz Now stop fooling around and get some proper work done or I'll report you. Quaz on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133778 Mon, 06 Aug 2012 23:18:07 +0000 Quaz 133778@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ No, I def asked for suggestions for a headline, and you said you didn't know but you'd think about it. It's that whole Evil Island debacle again when I asked you what colour to paint the submarine and you said "Whatever", so I went ahead with cerise and then you said it didn't look evil enough. Have you any idea how much it costs to repaint a submarine? No eye for detail! That's it,I'm off to drink Mojitos on the beach in Rio with the Brazilian women's volly ball team. At least they provide shaving razors. The All New Jeni B on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133761 Mon, 06 Aug 2012 21:08:58 +0000 The All New Jeni B 133761@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Because at no point did you say, "Jen, what about the headline? Any suggestions?" It's your fault, I just threw in some ideas and left you to it. I'm just relieved that it didn't somehow feature monkeys roller-skating on drugs. (That is STILL a very strange thought...) Quaz on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133760 Mon, 06 Aug 2012 21:03:11 +0000 Quaz 133760@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Jeni, brilliant, you have nailed the headline. Why couldn't you have done that 24 hrs ago? You know, in that bit we losely call "writing it". The All New Jeni B on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133752 Mon, 06 Aug 2012 20:07:20 +0000 The All New Jeni B 133752@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Perhaps we should have gone for: "New Study Reveals Why Managers Hold Meetings In Doorways."? waylandsmithy on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133720 Mon, 06 Aug 2012 18:18:00 +0000 waylandsmithy 133720@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ "...I'M BY THE GENERATOR" "CAN YOU MOVE AWAY FROM IT A LITTLE?" "NOT UNTIL I'VE WIPED MY ARSE." The All New Jeni B on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133718 Mon, 06 Aug 2012 18:17:01 +0000 The All New Jeni B 133718@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Midfield, I'm not a manager, but I know from experience that female co-workers hold loud and often detailed conversations from cubicles. I once discovered that about 15 colleagues were about to be made redundant in this way. Sinnick on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133716 Mon, 06 Aug 2012 18:15:45 +0000 Sinnick 133716@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Excellent sub, but I'm not sure about the title. Not very newsie Holding up the canteen tills is another favourite place for a meeting. And don't you just love them shouting into a phone while in a toilet cubicle? "SORRY FOR THE BACKGROUND NOISE, I'M BY THE GENERATOR" - followed by my shouting "NO YOU'RE NOT, YOU'RE HAVING A CRAP" and then running. Probably explains my current circumstances. Midfield Diamond on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133715 Mon, 06 Aug 2012 18:11:23 +0000 Midfield Diamond 133715@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Good one. I'm always amused if I'm in one of the traps when two managers walk in and extend the concept of a 'working lunch' to time spent standing at the urinals. A 'working piss' I suppose. Do female managers have similar arrangements while seated on the throne? Quaz on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133712 Mon, 06 Aug 2012 17:35:09 +0000 Quaz 133712@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Rikkor, you are right. It should read "A fuel tank for a sex machine". Wayland, that could be a good line in this. waylandsmithy on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133710 Mon, 06 Aug 2012 17:27:35 +0000 waylandsmithy 133710@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Nice. In our office, we're allowed to wear headphones, but we have to take them off if someone wants to sound important behind us. You know who you are, you annoying, loud bastard. rikkor on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133706 Mon, 06 Aug 2012 16:58:38 +0000 rikkor 133706@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ Like it. Look at the "I'm not fat..." line for sense. Quaz on "Just Why Do Managers Hold meetings in doorways?" http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=46430#post-133617 Mon, 06 Aug 2012 08:36:33 +0000 Quaz 133617@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ A recent report from the Institute of Behavioural Therapists has sought to cast light on the question of why people reaching management status feel the need to hold impromptu meetings in doorways and hallways. It is a phenomenon much observed and sworn about by office staff as they attempt to get to the loo or the coffee machine. The study of 100 companies observed that upon gaining a junior management position, the manager will tend to cluster close to a doorway along with other junior managers, much like young primates hanging around the scene of a kill. Once they are promoted to full managers with their own office, then the manager will tend to hang one hand off the door frame while talking to other managers in order to establish his or her territory. Upon gaining middle management status, the manager will tend to hold impromptu meetings in the doorway to the main office thus ensuring that the workers wishing to gain access to the office must show deference to them by saying “Excuse me” and sliding past in order to actually get some work done. In interviews conducted for the study someone who only wanted to be identified as “Brian Binsley,client resourses manager, grade 2” said “Once you have the arm up on the doorframe then they can smell your manly pheromones and straight away Dave from accounts is on the back foot”. He then went on to explain that “I’m not fat, it’s just a fuel tank for sex machine!”. Doreen, a female manager in her mid forties with bad makeup, a cat for a friend, and phallic high heels said “I particularly like to hold impromptu meetings outside the canteen doors, so everyone is stuck inside. I think it gives me an aggressive edge that shows I’m just as assertive as the men”. Doreen claims that she remains single through choice, and that she's married to her career. The spinster, who sports brassy, dyed hair is keen to stress that she considers herself just as able as her male counterparts, despite her menopausal hot flushes forcing her to hold meetings in well ventilated corridors. Once past the heady heights of middle management, executives and directors can give full reign to their instincts and hold meetings of up to 6 people, all clustered in a single busy corridor. Since participating in the study, Brian has gone on to establish legal history after being divorced by his wife on the grounds of "Excessive use of Power Point in the marital home". Doreen recently left the company after financial irregularities in the office led to an incident with a stapler, a teaspoon and various parts of the HR Director’s anatomy in what has come to be known as the Beverage Kitty Debacle." A Quaz and Jeni B production