http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Wed, 22 May 2013 19:32:13 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-132810 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 23:12:01 +0000 Yikes 132810@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thanks Cheshire Cat (and everyone else) for your kind words!</p> <p>Cheshire it was published a week ago (with a corrected headline) ... so probably fish and chip wrapping paper by now! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-132807 Sun, 29 Jul 2012 23:03:56 +0000 Cheshire Cat 132807@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Excellent!!! :)</p> <p>I can't wait for it to be published on the NB site, so I may share it... :) Well done!!</p> <p>Cheshire Cat :) </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131831 Tue, 24 Jul 2012 10:45:44 +0000 Des Custard 131831@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Mm. 5 late stars. Terrific. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131829 Tue, 24 Jul 2012 10:30:19 +0000 Perks 131829@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Yep. Great FP Yikes. Nice one </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131819 Tue, 24 Jul 2012 08:51:57 +0000 Qoxiivi 131819@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Cracking little switch-around, this. Potential WoM material I reckon. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131816 Tue, 24 Jul 2012 08:09:00 +0000 button 131816@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Lovely FP Yikes. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131810 Tue, 24 Jul 2012 07:09:06 +0000 Al OPecia 131810@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Superb. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131809 Tue, 24 Jul 2012 07:02:04 +0000 Sinnick 131809@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Fine FP </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131765 Tue, 24 Jul 2012 00:20:14 +0000 FlashArry 131765@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Excellent post - to the top of the heap with you - </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131682 Mon, 23 Jul 2012 11:43:39 +0000 charlies_hat 131682@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Very good work, 5 house points and a special mention in tomorrow mornings assembly. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131681 Mon, 23 Jul 2012 11:35:46 +0000 waylandsmithy 131681@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Love it, very strong! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131680 Mon, 23 Jul 2012 11:30:50 +0000 Yikes 131680@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Maybe it's because of the typo in the existing headline but I wonder about the alternative ... "Obama says no to gun control; bans people instead" </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131618 Sun, 22 Jul 2012 22:32:53 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 131618@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Very nice.</p> <p>Don't think the punchline is as strong as the rest of it, but that's only because the rest is really good. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131573 Sun, 22 Jul 2012 09:55:38 +0000 Yikes 131573@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Oh dear, what an obvious typo ... and I'm outside the edit deadline :( </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131565 Sun, 22 Jul 2012 09:07:38 +0000 kga6 131565@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Minus the n in headline, excellent idea. And nice punchline. Removing Americans would certainly solve this problem. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=45726#post-131555 Sun, 22 Jul 2012 02:42:06 +0000 Yikes 131555@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Faced with the National Rifle Association’s (NRA) compelling argument that “guns don’t kill people, people do”, President Obama has decided to ban people from the United States.</p> <p>“It has been far too easy to obtain people in America” said Obama. “While we have tried to limit people through immigration policies, people nakedly get round this by simply breeding. With this unchecked proliferation of people, guns have no trouble finding a person to fire them. Shockingly, in isolated areas people even outnumber guns.”</p> <p>Under Obama’s people control plan, all Americans will be relocated to Canada, and all guns will remain in the United States. “Without people to fire the guns, and without people to fire guns at, shootings will completely disappear” noted Obama.</p> <p>While America will generally be a people-free gun reserve, guns will be able to have occasional visitors if they obtain a concealed person permit and undertake a training course in safely handling humans. The training course will cover topics such as “the loner who still lives with their mum” and “hip hop stars – real anger or just an act?”</p> <p>NRA members are pleased that their tireless advocacy has headed off the evil of gun control. “Being forced to move to Canada is close to cruel and unusual punishment but it’s worth it to know my 183 guns are still protected under the US Constitution” said NRA member Jed Hicks. "But I will miss my guns - simple pleasures such as 'road rage' will now be just hot air and empty words."</p> <p>Canadian reaction to the plan has been generally positive on account of the expected boost to the economy. But the NRA argument “if someone did a mass killing with a baseball bat, it would be illogical to ban baseball bats” has caused widespread alarm in the harp seal community. </p>