http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Fri, 24 May 2013 11:36:06 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12554 Thu, 13 May 2010 21:44:09 +0000 Skylarking 12554@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I refer the right hon gentleman/lady to the previous 16 remarks... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12547 Thu, 13 May 2010 21:22:11 +0000 The All New Jeni B 12547@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>GC, another stonker old chum!</p> <p>I was chortling along as my Butler read it out to me, what?<br /> Jolly good stuff.<br /> Keep it up old chap.</p> <p>Toodle pip!</p> <p>Oh, and have five of those gold thingummies. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12545 Thu, 13 May 2010 21:07:07 +0000 Doctor Moptop 12545@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Genghis - I keep coming back to this and chortling. I read it out to a very depressed friend (depressed for political reasons) and even he couldn't help smiling.</p> <p>More please! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12387 Thu, 13 May 2010 10:55:44 +0000 Genghis Cohen 12387@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thanks all. Very kind.</p> <p>o b sensible - you are right, but of course Cameron campaigned on a platform of change. Plus he's a colossal twat.</p> <p>And Moptop. Leave some change in the royalties tin, won't you? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12364 Thu, 13 May 2010 08:57:49 +0000 Doctor Moptop 12364@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Top hole, what!</p> <p>Ok if I send this to various chums around the country? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12349 Thu, 13 May 2010 08:19:04 +0000 o b sensible 12349@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>ok Major Wilson Callaghan not posh but Douglas Home Eden Churchill and the rest very posh so I still don't see it but don't mind me </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12339 Thu, 13 May 2010 08:03:56 +0000 Oxbridge 12339@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>On second thoughts, 9.5 was stingy. This is political satire of the highest order and - if it makes FP, which it surely must - would be the best of the year so far. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12285 Wed, 12 May 2010 20:45:58 +0000 fun and games 12285@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>o b sensible - which site was it you were looking for? I think you may have taken a left turn one too early. Keep 'em coming Gengo. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12260 Wed, 12 May 2010 17:32:51 +0000 mpaterson 12260@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>'I was the first person in my family to go to university by private jet. To be honest, the whole thing hasn’t really sunk in yet – I have to keep asking my valet to pinch me.'</p> <p>Great. :D </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12232 Wed, 12 May 2010 14:53:32 +0000 TehEbilTony 12232@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I lol'd. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12208 Wed, 12 May 2010 12:56:53 +0000 MrChigleysAunt 12208@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p><blockquote>stablehands and their masters will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood, but with different menus. </blockquote> Excellent! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12189 Wed, 12 May 2010 11:29:38 +0000 Dickens or Shakespeare 12189@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Wilson was a grubby bugger at times. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12188 Wed, 12 May 2010 11:26:55 +0000 o b sensible 12188@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>don't quite get this, they have nearly all been white upper class males including Blair but not Thatcher </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12177 Wed, 12 May 2010 10:42:34 +0000 Griffin 12177@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>What else can I add to the comments above? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12168 Wed, 12 May 2010 10:17:51 +0000 Scroat 12168@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Absolutely ace. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12165 Wed, 12 May 2010 10:07:07 +0000 Oxbridge 12165@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Bwahahahahahahaha - even if I did get there a fraction of a second earlier. 9.5. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12164 Wed, 12 May 2010 10:05:51 +0000 MightyBlair 12164@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Lovely angle, well executed. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=4353#post-12150 Wed, 12 May 2010 09:27:42 +0000 Genghis Cohen 12150@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Only a year after the inauguration of the first black President of the United States, change swept through Britain last night as history was made and a white upper-class man ascended to the highest political office in the land.</p> <p>‘It’s a real fags to riches story,’ said humbled new Prime Minister, David Cameron. ‘When I was growing up on an estate in Berkshire, I never dreamed that someone like me could become anything more than a high court judge or chief executive of an investment bank. I was the first person in my family to go to university by private jet. To be honest, the whole thing hasn’t really sunk in yet – I have to keep asking my valet to pinch me.’</p> <p>Equalities campaigners say that Cameron’s success is all the more striking for the obstacles still faced by white upper-class boys – or the ‘Great Ignored’. Health reforms have done nothing to reduce infant mortality rates among the rich, with many newborn heirs and heiresses continuing to suffer complications from being born with silver spoons in their mouths. And even in the 21st century, segregation still persists in some areas of the South, with state schools often adopting a policy of ‘No paedos, poofs or toffs’, excluding young aristocrats on at least one count and forcing them to fund their own educations.</p> <p>‘I’m so grateful for the sacrifices others have made for me,’ said David Cameron, ‘like Lord Ashcroft foregoing that fourth yacht to fund our campaign. But it is not right in this day and age that someone like me should be reliant on handouts to shatter the glass ceiling which for so long has stopped well-off male Caucasians reaching down and wielding real power over those beneath us. And that is why this Government will be committed to raising the affluent out of the mire of prosperity and helping them onto the road to full-blown, eye-popping wealth.’</p> <p>‘I have a dream,’ continued Cameron, turning to the crowds gathered outside No.10. ‘A dream that one day my children will live in a nation where they will not be judged by the content of their character, but by the colour of their money. A dream that one day on the green hills of Oxfordshire, stablehands and their masters will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood, but with different menus. And until the chance to lead your nation becomes a birthright for all citizens of wealth, I shall continue to rail against prejudice and injustice and dream of a better nation, one where nothing stands between the Eustaces and Tarquins of tomorrow and them taking their rightful place at the country’s head table.’</p> <p>‘He should be careful,’ said a black veteran of the civil rights movement. ‘That kinda talk is liable to get him assassinated.’ </p>