http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Wed, 22 May 2013 23:59:06 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543#post-118595 Sun, 15 Apr 2012 21:56:46 +0000 grumblechops 118595@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Ooh the tag slag is picking on me now. Lovely. Please point me in the direction of one of your subs that you think is better </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543#post-118502 Sat, 14 Apr 2012 13:17:33 +0000 Qoxiivi 118502@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Really good. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543#post-118488 Sat, 14 Apr 2012 10:13:05 +0000 button 118488@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Very funny, this will make a good FP. Its 5 from me. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543#post-118475 Sat, 14 Apr 2012 05:34:38 +0000 Gerontius 118475@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Olympics, Wimbledon, Euro Championship....how about boredom </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543#post-118449 Fri, 13 Apr 2012 20:45:55 +0000 grumblechops 118449@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>thanks guys. i realise i don't often come back and acknowledge the thumbs-ups i get on my stories, but i do really appreciate them </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543#post-118446 Fri, 13 Apr 2012 19:22:07 +0000 Danny 118446@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>This is one of the best I've seen in a while! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543#post-118442 Fri, 13 Apr 2012 19:02:04 +0000 RickH 118442@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>But what about the dreaded "Friday-afternoon-cup-final-post-session-I'm-yours-darlin'-annual-review-rush-deadline" virus?</p> <p>We must lose more working days to that than anything else. 'cept p'raps the one that kills your granny 5 times. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543#post-118438 Fri, 13 Apr 2012 18:52:34 +0000 custard cream 118438@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Really great, well done! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543#post-118435 Fri, 13 Apr 2012 17:57:17 +0000 waylandsmithy 118435@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>More gold from Grumblechops! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543#post-118432 Fri, 13 Apr 2012 17:50:53 +0000 beau-jolly 118432@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Very nicely done. Many stars. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543#post-118431 Fri, 13 Apr 2012 17:39:06 +0000 dvo4fun 118431@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>or Monday morning "I don't feel too well" syndrome </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543#post-118425 Fri, 13 Apr 2012 17:21:31 +0000 Perks 118425@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nice. My money's on man-flu. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=41543#post-118416 Fri, 13 Apr 2012 16:14:15 +0000 grumblechops 118416@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Health Secretary Andrew Lansley laughed off claims that the government was shockingly unprepared to cause the necessary levels of panic this summer, hinting that advisers were close to deciding which animal might be the source of the virus which would almost certainly kill everyone on the planet by Christmas.</p> <p>Keen to improve on the fear caused by previous campaigns such as 2009's classic “Swine Flu will kill 2 million,” Lansley is currently keeping his cards close to his chest. However experts point to a number of early candidates, any of which could yet be the catalyst that petrifies otherwise healthy people into demanding a miracle cure to a disease they probably haven't got and that won't kill them anyway. </p> <p>“If you look around, the clues are there” said the BBC’s science correspondent Jonathan Amos. “North America’s got white-nose syndrome in bats and you’ve got badger TB in this country. But my money is on the Schmallenberg sheep virus – if Lansley can just find a farmer with an infected sheep who then dies of a pre-existing medical condition, well you’ve got your winner.”</p> <p>Mr Lansley has been holding regular meetings with Glaxo-Smithkline, who are contracted to treat the UK’s medical hysteria, to ensure an insufficient amount of anti-viral drugs will be available for distribution in a chaotic and haphazard manner. </p> <p>Meanwhile Francis Maude is believed to be drafting a set of bafflingly contradictory instructions which should result in nothing more than a few exploding garages. </p>