http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38886 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Sat, 25 May 2013 22:00:49 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38886#post-110349 Mon, 20 Feb 2012 22:37:30 +0000 writinginbsl 110349@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>funny idea</p> <p>i would have him being 'interviewed' though imho -who is he talking to? and i prefer a past tense too-but that was just me</p> <p>lotsa stars tho </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38886#post-110348 Mon, 20 Feb 2012 22:33:39 +0000 FlashArry 110348@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Excellent - have some stars !</p> <p>You must be all tinkered out now - </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38886#post-110303 Mon, 20 Feb 2012 17:10:48 +0000 Haywood Manley 110303@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Edited the bejeezus out of it - must stop fiddling with it.... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38886#post-110280 Mon, 20 Feb 2012 14:45:04 +0000 Haywood Manley 110280@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Much expanded now. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38886#post-110249 Mon, 20 Feb 2012 12:13:55 +0000 Haywood Manley 110249@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <br /> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38886#post-110240 Mon, 20 Feb 2012 11:44:55 +0000 Haywood Manley 110240@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>It smells a bit and the door won't close properly but it'll do for the time being. Well, it'll do for this time being!" quips the Doctor as he prepares to head off on yet another time-travelling adventure, this time swapping his trademark blue police box for a far less salubrious portable lavatory.</p> <p>"The other one broke down next week," he explains, "We're having to have parts specially made back on Gallifrey, but all being well they should be ready sometime in 1968. Can't wait to be honest."</p> <p>He goes on to explain that while the TURDIS is as paradoxically large on the inside as the dimension-busting TARDIS, much of that useful extra space is taken up by what the Doctor can only describe as "literally mountains of other people's shit."</p> <p>"It could really do with emptying."</p> <p>Yet despite the obvious ignominy involved when one's mode of transport is basically a modified filthy plastic toilet, traversing time and space in the TURDIS is not without its lighter moments,</p> <p>"The guidance system is all over the place," chuckles Who. "Half the time we don't know where we'll end up. There was this one bloke in Spain we materialised in front of - middle of nowhere it was - frightened the life out of him we did. But do you know what his first words to me were when I went over to apologise? "Buenas tardes senor." Even though I don't speak Spanish I could tell what he meant and I thought that was really nice of him."</p> <p>A far cry indeed from the sorts of welcome the Doctor is used to receiving from villainous Cybermen and the like during his universe-spanning voyages.</p> <p>"Anyway, you must excuse me," he says, "We've run out of sonic toilet paper again."</p> <p>And with that, all the while trying not to gag, he disappears into the bowels of the TURDIS. </p> <p>As the sign on the door changes from vacant to engaged there's a strange kind of "flushing" noise, a barely audible cry of "Cheerio!", and the noble Time Lord is gone once more - the only sign he was ever here being a yellowed square of flattened grass, and a pong that could floor a dalek. </p>