http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Fri, 24 May 2013 09:24:15 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108668 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 17:51:11 +0000 Immunis 108668@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>top story, excellent FP </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108643 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 15:47:01 +0000 beau-jolly 108643@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Qox Thanks for pointing to the previous sub. Saved me being arsed. I was going to give you lots of stars but as it's already a FP there's no point.<br /> BTW, I thought "Blow-up doll" was a great gag </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108635 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 13:21:00 +0000 waylandsmithy 108635@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>There's a prototype about to explode into the market:</p> <p><a href="http://www.theculture.net/barbie/">boom boom</a></p> <p>...that even got them worked up on Snopes. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108631 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 12:26:10 +0000 ianslat 108631@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thanks. I remember when all this was just fields... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108629 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 12:15:00 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 108629@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nice Action Man story ianslat. From 2008 I see - you're a proper NB veteran aren't you? Don't think I was even born then. But my maths isn't too hot. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108626 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 11:57:13 +0000 ianslat 108626@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Lovely stuff Qoxiivi.</p> <p>This might be the action man type one you're thinking of dvo <a href="http://www.newsbiscuit.com/2008/02/20/makers-of-action-man-sued-for-inadequate-equipment-305/">Makers of Action Man sued for inadequate equipment</a>, which mentions the Barbie at the end, but definitely worth an FP on its own. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108611 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 09:51:19 +0000 Major Clanger 108611@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>My chuckle muscles have just had their morning warm-up. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108602 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 08:07:24 +0000 Sinnick 108602@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Fantastic. 5 exploding stars.<br /> Just keep writing ! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108591 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 02:05:31 +0000 Nick McCarr 108591@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Not the blow-up doll most envisaged I would bet. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108588 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 00:12:22 +0000 FlashArry 108588@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Well played ! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108587 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 00:08:17 +0000 Qoxiivi 108587@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Yay! And thanks for the tidying edits NB staff. Have to say though, has lost the original nub of the gag, namely 'blow-up doll'; well, as a stand-alone header punchline anyway. I don't know, perhaps it was too ambiguous. Either way, am delighted to get an FP after so much time away.</p> <p>Would just like to say, by the way, I love the 'can't be deported' image tag. Lovely work. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108586 Wed, 08 Feb 2012 00:02:57 +0000 Perks 108586@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Brilliant FP. Belated stars </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108572 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 22:32:35 +0000 FlashArry 108572@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Five stars and a fatwa </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108567 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 22:15:42 +0000 The All New Jeni B 108567@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I loved the 'normal Barbie, just a bit brown' line.<br /> Have five cartoon style "kaboom" stars. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108566 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 21:59:47 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 108566@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Good stuff </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108534 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 18:37:21 +0000 writinginbsl 108534@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>very funny and clever</p> <p>many stars </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108530 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 17:51:53 +0000 waylandsmithy 108530@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>There was a joke about a talking suicide bomber doll. But everyone was too scared to pull the cord. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108528 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 17:36:14 +0000 Qoxiivi 108528@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Cheers all. It shouldn't have been, but writing and structuring this one was tortuous - have been so busy and am so out of practice. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108526 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 17:19:00 +0000 RickH 108526@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Many stars,</p> <p>p.s. Barbie never comes with Ken. She comes with Action Man; she just fakes it with Ken </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108521 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 17:02:15 +0000 Skylarking 108521@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>But tell me: does my bomb look big in this? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108520 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 16:59:01 +0000 Gerontius 108520@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Pull the jogging bottoms back up guys...this one actually explodes. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108510 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 16:16:04 +0000 Oxbridge 108510@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Also available from Mattel, Divorced Barbie. Comes complete with Ken's house.</p> <p>(c) Very Old Gags, 2012 </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108482 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 13:57:07 +0000 dvo4fun 108482@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>yep that's the one. </p> <p>Your 5 stars stay awarded - great theme, lines &amp; jokes. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108478 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 13:37:44 +0000 Qoxiivi 108478@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I think I know the post you mean - it was a similar NiB-length sub. It was uncanny actually, I've had the whole blow-up doll idea on the back burners for months but simply haven't had time to write it, until now. Then, a few months ago someone hit on the same kind of joke completely out of the blue. I replied on that sub when it was posted stating as such so that when I completed this it wasn't seen as a rip off, so to speak. Either way, if you're thinking of the same sub, it's this one: <a href="http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=31255" rel="nofollow">http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=31255</a> </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108477 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 13:35:53 +0000 dvo4fun 108477@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Yeah - rings bells with me also [along the Action Man line] but this is a cracker.</p> <p>I'll award stars now and if I have a change of heart later I'll either deduct them or pop round to Qoxiivi's for a little 3rd level stoning. Others are welcome to join in but you'll have to bring your own rocks as I'm down to my last sack. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108475 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 13:26:55 +0000 beau-jolly 108475@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Jolly good but... I'm sure I read something similar a while back. Can I reserve stars until I have found it? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38361#post-108473 Tue, 07 Feb 2012 13:16:08 +0000 Qoxiivi 108473@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Popular toy manufacturer, Mattel, is expanding into the hard-to-crack Islamic extremist market with a new exploding version of their flagship doll, Barbie.</p> <p>The new doll has already caused buying frenzies and serious injuries in market stalls from Riyadh to Islamabad and Mattel CEO, Robert Eckert, is delighted with how the product has been received.</p> <p>‘It’s proving a real gifting hit with mums and imams everywhere and we’re particularly proud of the pull-string martyrdom feature. One tug, up go the arms, and she runs forward screaming either ‘Allahu Akbar!’ or ‘visit mattel.com for exclusive Barbie games and accessories’ before detonating.’</p> <p>‘There’s no doubt it’s the new toy every child wants, and even those who’ve been lucky enough to get their hands on one are desperate to get what now remains of their hands on a replacement.’</p> <p>He continued, ‘They’re getting a lot of bang for their buck too. Blow-up Barbie is not only packed with hours of entertainment, but also nails and a concentrated fertiliser-based explosive. The whole product reeks of quality. And also slightly of ammonium nitrate.’</p> <p>With regards to accessories, Eckert says Mattel realised early on that Blow-up Barbie simply wouldn’t be complete (or allowed to leave her small plastic house) without a new Ken to accompany her.</p> <p>‘We’re very proud of our fundamentalist Ken too. He has fully movable limbs and comes with little rocks and a flog to ‘correct’ Barbie if she leaves the house without her burka on, or if the child decides to pretend she might be thinking about getting an education.’</p> <p>However, despite the doll’s success, Eckert has admitted that the product’s development and production hasn’t been entirely without its complications.</p> <p>‘The whole venture has been something of a departure from the norm, yes. Usually a big corporation like us would wait for our government to invade and homogenise a marketplace before releasing a normal Barbie that’s just a bit brown.’ he says.</p> <p>‘By doing things this way we knew we’d have to take into account various religious and cultural sensitivities. In fact, we’ve already had to issue one product recall after complaints about the potential harm that could be caused to children by a faulty batch showing too much ankle.’ </p>