http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Sat, 25 May 2013 18:06:22 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562#post-106014 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 21:25:53 +0000 charlies_hat 106014@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Another winner !.... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562#post-106008 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 21:10:41 +0000 Ironduke 106008@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>'killing in the face' child's quote is briliant, as others have noted.</p> <p>Love the sub, my constructive crit is perhaps the title could be punchier and link to the content better </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562#post-106001 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 19:54:16 +0000 Username 106001@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Great 'character' quotes. Lovely. ***** </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562#post-105999 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 19:50:25 +0000 button 105999@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Really good </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562#post-105996 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 19:34:50 +0000 Perks 105996@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Lovely job </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562#post-105983 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 17:03:56 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 105983@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Ditto BJ, 'did you kill anyone in the face with a missile' is a nice line. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562#post-105958 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 15:06:17 +0000 beau-jolly 105958@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>"Kill anyone in the face..." I liked that. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562#post-105954 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 14:54:37 +0000 Golgo13 105954@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Kudos for ass-hurting reference. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562#post-105953 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 14:53:01 +0000 waylandsmithy 105953@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thanks Ostsee, bit early in the week for my maths to kick in. Also, I'm bad at maths. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562#post-105949 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 14:40:24 +0000 dvo4fun 105949@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Given the hope that things might kick-off somewhere nice, I expect he might have been a tad pissed off to find himself in the south atlantic - even if he had enjoyed a free Cunard cruise down there on QE2. There's only so many penguins one can look at in wonder </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562#post-105948 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 14:39:31 +0000 Ostsee 105948@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thirty years? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562#post-105946 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 14:29:06 +0000 dvo4fun 105946@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Classic Gold. Particularly like 'fun-size skirmish' and 'Fray Bentos' lines </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=37562#post-105945 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 14:23:09 +0000 waylandsmithy 105945@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>A veteran soldier has offered a heart-felt apology, after being reunited with an Argentinian pilot he shot down during the Falklands conflict. Despite being given the chance to put thirty years of doubt and remorse behind him, retired Corporal Jim Westbury failed once again to kill the slippery foe in front of gathered local media.</p> <p>Westbury was given a powerful weapon during the 1982 fun-size skirmish, a weapon he recalls fondly. "We didn't have 'Medal of Honor' in my day", explained the father of two, "back then if you were bored, you had to join the armed forces and hope it kicked off somewhere nice."</p> <p>Westbury's eldest son has often questioned his father about the incident, before exaggerating about it online. "When Andy's been shooting strangers on his Xbox, he'll often ask me 'did you kill anyone in the face with a missile, daddy?' It's a terrible thing to admit, but I used to lie to the little chap. I gave him the impression I'd mowed down hundreds."</p> <p>But Westbury's dark secret couldn't stay hidden forever. Despite witnessing the Argentinian jet billowing smoke and spiralling to earth, the young soldier couldn't be sure that the pilot had spent his dying moments in agony, trapped in the burning, twisted wreckage. </p> <p>"My boys wanted to believe it was true, but there was always that nagging doubt", admitted Westbury. "Then one day I got the call I'd feared. The pilot was alive and wanted to meet me. What was I supposed to do? Admit to the kids I'd only ever very seriously wounded someone?"</p> <p>Westbury had promised his family that he would try and make amends during the two hour meeting, but had to settle for swapping a teatowel of Wigan for a Fray Bentos pie in front of a studio audience. "There was a teaspoon on my saucer, a teaspoon my kids think I could easily have used to kill a man. But somehow, it just didn't feel right."</p> <p>Against all odds, the former enemies not only survived the meeting, but became friends. "We've swapped numbers", revealed Westbury, "He's phoned me twice already. I told his son it was a lucky shot, and he assured my two that his ass still really hurts. It's important for youngsters to have role models they can look up to." </p>