http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34700 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Fri, 24 May 2013 01:50:57 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34700#post-98335 Tue, 29 Nov 2011 15:58:13 +0000 greg various 98335@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I could tell you why but I'm on my best behaviour today. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34700#post-98239 Tue, 29 Nov 2011 08:55:42 +0000 Scroat 98239@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>A boat docked in a tiny Mexican village. An American tourist complimented the Mexican fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them.</p> <p>“Not very long,” answered the Mexican.</p> <p>“But then, why didn't you stay out longer and catch more?” asked the American.</p> <p>The Mexican explained that his small catch was sufficient to meet his needs and those of his family.</p> <p>The American asked, “But what do you do with the rest of your time?”</p> <p>“I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, and take a siesta with my wife. In the evenings, I go into the village to see my friends, have a few drinks, play the guitar, and sing a few songs...I have a full life.”</p> <p>The American interrupted, “I have an MBA from Harvard and I can help you! You should start by fishing longer every day. You can then sell the extra fish you catch. With the extra revenue, you can buy a bigger boat. With the extra money the larger boat will bring, you can buy a second one and a third one and so on until you have an entire fleet of trawlers. Instead of selling your fish to a middle man, you can negotiate directly with the processing plants and maybe even open your own plant. You can then leave this little village and move to Mexico City, Los Angeles, or even New York City! From there you can direct your huge enterprise.”</p> <p>“How long would that take?” asked the Mexican.</p> <p>“Twenty, perhaps twenty-five years,” replied the American.</p> <p>“And after that?”</p> <p>“Afterwards? That's when it gets really interesting,” answered the American, laughing. “When your business gets really big, you can start selling stocks and make millions!”</p> <p>“Millions? Really? And after that?”</p> <p>“After that you'll be able to retire, live in a tiny village near the coast, sleep late, play with your children, catch a few fish, take a siesta, and spend your evenings drinking and enjoying your friends.” </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34700#post-98206 Mon, 28 Nov 2011 22:45:48 +0000 Scroat 98206@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Yes, crystal clear. It's like, take away the number you first thought of...</p> <p>Sort of... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34700#post-98068 Mon, 28 Nov 2011 11:07:56 +0000 Chuts 98068@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Scroat, have you got it yet? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34700#post-98067 Mon, 28 Nov 2011 11:06:11 +0000 Chuts 98067@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>And then, after the hotelier has been bankrupted by the interest charges, Holiday Inn puts in a favourable offer to buy the hotel from the bank. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34700#post-98066 Mon, 28 Nov 2011 11:02:12 +0000 Chuts 98066@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Next, a French bank manager writes to the hotelier to tell her that she's €195,98 overdrawn, comprising €150,53 for the grocery bill plus €5,95 for currency conversion charges plus €39,50 for unauthorised overdraft charges.</p> <p>He demands to know when the hotelier will pay off her unauthorised overdraft and she explains that she's sure she'll be able to pay it off soon because she's getting a lot of business recently from American tourists.</p> <p>Rather than write off the €195,98 owed to him, the French banker grants the hotelier a loan of €200,00 at 25% interest per annum, cumulative monthly, and takes title to the hotel as surety. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34700#post-98065 Mon, 28 Nov 2011 10:37:57 +0000 andhrimnir 98065@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>The hotelier is $200 worse off. She was owed $200 at the beginning of the story, at the end she isn't but nor does she have the $200. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34700#post-98054 Mon, 28 Nov 2011 09:23:05 +0000 Sinnick 98054@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>It's an excellent explanation. UK owes US vast amounts. US owes UK vast amounts. So, perhaps each could manage these debts in-house instead of between states. Not simple, but might help ?<br /> <a href="http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-15748696" rel="nofollow">http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-15748696</a></p> <p>And to demonstrate my naivity further, take a look at the figures in this (large) download listing assets/liabilities of most of the world's countries. Note the Cayman Islands.<br /> <a href="http://www.bis.org/statistics/provbstats.pdf#page=7" rel="nofollow">http://www.bis.org/statistics/provbstats.pdf#page=7</a> </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34700#post-98052 Mon, 28 Nov 2011 08:42:49 +0000 rickwestwell 98052@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Don't go into banking, Scroat. Or Hotelling. :-) </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34700#post-98051 Mon, 28 Nov 2011 08:27:15 +0000 dvo4fun 98051@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Scroat it's quite easy and there's something in there about bankers skimming 10% at each transaction. First you err .. umm. Look, it's like this ..err. No I'll start again; the reason why ... err. Umm. I'll have to give this a little thought mmmm ah err..Ooh, I've got quite a headache.. err......</p> <p>BOOM! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34700#post-98050 Mon, 28 Nov 2011 08:13:03 +0000 Scroat 98050@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>An American tourist checks in at a little hotel in the south of France. He pays $200 for his room. </p> <p>The hotelier nips round the corner and pays off her bill at the grocery store. </p> <p>The grocer goes to the bar and clears his slate. </p> <p>The owner of the bar settles up with the garage who repaired her car last week. </p> <p>The garage owner arrives at the hotel and pays off the remaining debt on his daughter's wedding reception, just as the American gets a phone call telling him his wife is in hospital in Paris. He cancels his booking, and the hotelier gives him the $200 he's just been given by the garage owner. The American leaves town. </p> <p>Everything's the same as before, and no one's any worse off - only now no one owes anyone anything... </p>