http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Fri, 24 May 2013 02:11:38 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85788 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 15:37:58 +0000 LouCipher 85788@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Anybody that wants to rewrite go right ahead! And to be completely honest I did not write the Translation. It was done by an online translator <a href="http://www.joel.net/EBONICS/Translator" rel="nofollow">http://www.joel.net/EBONICS/Translator</a> . It was playing around with this translator that gave me the idea.</p> <p>Thanks for all the useful feedback. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85776 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 15:14:53 +0000 beau-jolly 85776@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I'm sure you will. ;) </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85774 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 14:59:20 +0000 Screenie 85774@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>What a great idea for a game Beau, I may try it sometime. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85772 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 14:43:55 +0000 beau-jolly 85772@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Here's a good game: Playing naked cricket and drawing lots to be the stumps. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85768 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 14:32:07 +0000 Screenie 85768@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Lou, whether or not you're any good at writing subs may be in debate but you sure as hell know how to reel in the comments. 2 subs, 54 comments. Respect. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85751 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 13:50:27 +0000 Runestone Cowboy 85751@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I just found this teddy bear outside on the pavement. Belong to anyone? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85731 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 12:48:32 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 85731@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Oh, and I think my comment earlier about it feeling familiar was me getting confused with 'Da Gospel According to Ali G', which isn't very good. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85725 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 12:42:16 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 85725@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Speaking as a writer who has SEVERAL, count them, SEVERAL, subs that have sank without trace, and on reflection been a bit shit, I think Textbook's effort above showed that he is more than qualified to improve this with authentic sounding gangsta lingo. An' shit.</p> <p>There's nothing wrong with letting other people help improve your subs. If you don't like a suggestion for an addition to a sub just pretend you haven't seen it for 6 hours, then say "sorry, I would have included that but the edit window is shut now". </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85724 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 12:37:38 +0000 Textbook 85724@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I just read the sub again and I gotta give Lou some advice- watch it with the black folks because that wasn't even gangster talk, that was watermelon time and you gon' get yourself in pain if you know any black people but can't tell the difference. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85719 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 12:35:24 +0000 Textbook 85719@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Will do, maybe tomorrow or Saturday.</p> <p>I need to put the finishing touches on Angry Serbs. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85715 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 12:29:58 +0000 writinginbsl 85715@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>texty</p> <p>why dont you just write it?<br /> put away your angry eyes and let us read your sub?<br /> theres room for all of us </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85711 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 12:24:26 +0000 Textbook 85711@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>But I would. I didn't moan about Qoxiivi claiming he could rewrite my Angry Kurds sub better than I. I let him try and he did do it better than me.</p> <p>As endlessly iterated during the Battlestar Galactica fiasco, Lou hasn't quite got the ropes of writing yet. So why not let a seasoned vet like me who has, I believe, FOUR, count them, FOUR front pages on an unpaid comedy writing site to his name, and who, judging by the ignorance of the chicken and cornbread crack, is also better equipped to handle the subject, step in and lend a hand? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85710 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 12:23:34 +0000 Tristan Shout 85710@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Yeah, well good luck with that, shithead, because Two Witches haven't toured in like 3 years. FAIL! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85708 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 12:19:22 +0000 writinginbsl 85708@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>who said anything about 'testity'?<br /> is it anything to do with breast health? awareness month or something?</p> <p>btw-'i'll do a better job than you'???<br /> Humble pie, anyone? Theres quite a lot left...</p> <p>ps love cookie monsta/rebel sonix</p> <p>pps two witches are a pile of wank (are they a popular beat combo?) </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85707 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 12:17:38 +0000 Mr Target 85707@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>The Machine in the Garden are shite! I'd rather listen to two witches going at it! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85705 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 12:15:26 +0000 Tristan Shout 85705@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Background Radiation are a load of pretentious American indie wank. I'd rather listen to the machine in the garden. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85695 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 11:53:13 +0000 Textbook 85695@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Lou, you give the word and I will rewrite in a new thread like happened to my Angry Kurds submission. I'll do a better job than you. That's *not* meant as a slam, I just know the lingo/culture better. You will get first credit. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85691 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 11:50:54 +0000 Textbook 85691@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Lol at people so ignorant of musical genre that they think rap music is the one where you're asked to testity, feeling they're qualified to pass judgment on what's good to listen to. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85688 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 11:40:25 +0000 waylandsmithy 85688@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>This is a good idea, and doesn't ring any bells. The headline is funny, just needs a bit more structure to the body of text. And it needs a killer ending, too. Just can't think of one at the moment. Doesn't rap music occasionally ask people to 'Testify'? I'm not certain: I normally prefer to listen to background radiation. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85674 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 10:59:18 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 85674@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I think it's a decent idea but I've got a nagging feeling that I've seen it before somewhere, can't think where though.</p> <p>Good work from Textbook on the re-write.</p> <p>And Lou - glad to see you haven't been put off by the less than warm welcome your first effort was met with. Was a bit surprised by that, people are usually a bit more friendly here, subs that don't quite hit the mark tend to be ignored rather than abused. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85670 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 10:56:03 +0000 beau-jolly 85670@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Mind you, the headline works as a ticker on its own. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85667 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 10:47:33 +0000 Textbook 85667@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Great idea Lou and a huge improvement on your last sub.</p> <p>Permit me to rewrite this. As a former rapper (yes, really) and someone very familiar with rap language, I might pimp yo sub mad tight.</p> <p>"In tha beginninz was this mad fly pimp, the G O D, and he all like creatin' shit cos he get down like that. And he be all like "Where the earth up in this bitch?" and bada boom the earth is like poppin' out the formless void. But it's hella dark, like darker than Akon's ass cheeks, so god be sayin' "Yo is there some light in the house?" and it it gets lighter than that Drake creampuff. And then god be sayin' "Let there be Biggie." And then on the seventh day he smoked out."</p> <p>And yo, on the real, that chicken and cornbread ish be borderline racist son. Move on with that shit. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85654 Thu, 15 Sep 2011 10:00:17 +0000 writinginbsl 85654@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Lou<br /> thoughts...but bear in mind i dont produce anything here really</p> <p>Could be a good idea (similar has been done here, i think-check back.<br /> Instead of just 'translating' the texts, perhaps you could interpret the text instead, eg god is replaced with...<br /> IMHO it is too long a piece for just a translation.</p> <p>Also-try writing out of your 'religion' comfort zone. Read news etc, perhaps an advert or something (see writers guidelines)<br /> Anyway i thought id bump you in case anyone else cares to add any words of wisdom </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85572 Wed, 14 Sep 2011 18:49:19 +0000 LouCipher 85572@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I have no Idea why some of the text came out different! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=30452#post-85571 Wed, 14 Sep 2011 18:47:12 +0000 LouCipher 85571@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>In an effort to combat the rise in atheism amongst the worlds youths the Vatican has announced that it is going to be distributing a new version of the Bible geared towards the younger generation. Archbishop S. Macfarlane made the announcement this morning "We at the Vatican are greatly concerned for today's youth and their dangerous trip towards Atheism. After giving it considerable thought we came up with the idea of writing the Bible in a manner that would be attractive to the youth of this generation and what better way then gangsta." Although we were not able see a final version of what is being called "The Holy Bible - Gangsta Edition" we were given some samples of what to expect.</p> <p>Genesis 1:1-3</p> <p>1 In da beginning God created da heavens an' da earf. 2 Now da earf wuz formless an' empty, darkness wuz ova da surface o' da deep, an' da Spirit o' God wuz hovering ova da waters.</p> <p>3 an' God said, “Let dere be light,” an' dere wuz light. 4 God seen dat da light wuz pimp-tight, an' he separated da light from da darkness. 5 God called da light “day,” an' da darkness he called “night.” an' dere wuz evening, an' dere wuz morning—da first day.</p> <p>Genesis 1:29-31</p> <p>29 Then God said, “ah give you every seed-bearing plant on da face o' da whole earf an' every tree dat has fruit wif seed in it. dey will be yours fo' chickn n<code>corn bread &#39;n waffles. 30 an&#39; ta all da beasts o&#39; da earf an&#39; all da birds in da sky an&#39; all da creatures dat move along da ground—everything dat has da breaf o&#39; life in it—ah give every green plant fo&#39; chickn n</code> corn bread 'n waffles.” an' it wuz so.</p> <p>31 God seen all dat he had made, an' it wuz very pimp-tight. an' dere wuz evening, an' dere wuz morning—da sixf day Ya' dig? </p>