http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Sat, 18 May 2013 10:37:20 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-80140 Mon, 01 Aug 2011 13:50:29 +0000 dvo4fun 80140@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Yeah but what a bonus for the disinfectant and stiff broom industries. So, swings and roundabouts </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-80133 Mon, 01 Aug 2011 13:36:47 +0000 Drylaw 80133@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Evil stuff Stella. Glad someone has taken the opportunity to slag it off. </p> <p>When Stella appeared in UK it was thought to be very cool.</p> <p>Little did we know of their plans to devastate our towns and cities. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79902 Sat, 30 Jul 2011 10:39:21 +0000 waylandsmithy 79902@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Qoxiivi, ta for that, it seems obvious now you've pointed it out! Thanks for all the other comments, particularly Pabst Blue Ribbon: I've only just worked out the subtext on your posts, very funny, I definitely smirked once I worked it out! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79899 Sat, 30 Jul 2011 10:17:36 +0000 Qoxiivi 79899@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>A few tiny things I’d change (don’t think the pay-off* needs ‘being’) but yes, very very good, rather unsurprisingly.</p> <p>*which itself is excellent </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79884 Sat, 30 Jul 2011 06:43:00 +0000 f0zz 79884@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Magnifique, mon ami! They could rehash the recent 'comic accident' tv ads maybe, like the guy rolling through town on a piano and that chap getting dressed by falling onto clotheslines, only this time with added zoned-out, pathological expressions and bloodshed. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79881 Sat, 30 Jul 2011 01:05:22 +0000 Ironduke 79881@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Five partially opened jaune cocktail brollies of mirth </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79837 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 18:32:33 +0000 JohnA 79837@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Wayland: you're a complete bastard and I hate your guts. 5* </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79833 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 17:52:46 +0000 rickwestwell 79833@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>It'sh great, and you're my best friend, you are. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79831 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 17:45:48 +0000 dvo4fun 79831@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Funny from top to bottom.</p> <p>Of course we would generally not wish to pick out any one sentence for particular praise for, after all, have not all the sentences, in their own way, contributed to the whole. </p> <p>But:- "french-sounding apple-flavoured tramp fuel'. Still chuckling. Top Form Wayland.</p> <p>Concerned about the sheer volume of liquid that has to be consumed to get wankered on 4%? Whether Stella or some other. Why not adopt my own approach and go for the 40% a.b.v. to be found within all UK standard spirits bottles? I find that I can pour a sensible measure and down it before taking my coat off when I get home in the evening. Much more efficient ('SMARTER' I think those young management consultation scamps would have it). There is of course further debate around the issue of the rather stingy 37.5% rating of gin. 37.5% What's that about!? </p> <p>Right - time for the bar </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79830 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 17:24:33 +0000 iRonA 79830@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I am not quite sure why you think that drinking Belgian beer to the point of being abusive is the kind of thing the French would do. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79826 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 15:51:34 +0000 beau-jolly 79826@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>My uncle drank metal polish. It killed him but he had a lovely finish. He had tried Toilet Duck but went clean round the bend.</p> <p>Oh dear. Once more unto the bleach dear friends. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79824 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 15:35:56 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 79824@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Furniture polish, a bit of mr sheen mixed with lager goes down a treat. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79814 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 15:06:30 +0000 Pabst Blue Ribbon 79814@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Sorry about my earlier comment...it was just the beer talking. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79810 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 14:56:17 +0000 be reasonable 79810@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>"Don't drink stella any more, I've moved onto Polish lager, because it's stronger"...<br /> is that metal Polish or furniture Polish? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79807 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 14:39:00 +0000 beau-jolly 79807@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>VCG: How do you polish lager? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79802 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 14:10:01 +0000 simonjmr 79802@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Stella lager ( full strength) and Cidre as a Snakebite has been renamed as Stellacide - Its the drink of choice when hitting your wife is just not enough and you have to take on the world </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79801 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 14:06:10 +0000 button 79801@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Absolutley love the punchline. C'est fantastique. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79795 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 13:48:39 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 79795@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Great stuff. I didn't see the point of stella 4, the whole reason for drinking normal stella is to get wankered, if you're drinking one that's not as strong then you just need to drink more to reach the same level of bladdered.</p> <p>Don't drink stella any more, I've moved onto Polish lager, because it's stronger. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79792 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 13:41:09 +0000 Pabst Blue Ribbon 79792@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Fuck that shit... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79791 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 13:40:11 +0000 waylandsmithy 79791@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>'wife saver'. Brilliant, I shall use that in conversation!</p> <p>FraserWords: I was hoping that was the pun. Is it too subtle? Maybe needs a signpost before it. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79778 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 13:21:31 +0000 FraserWords 79778@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>...claiming the campaign is as tasteless as the beer?... nice one Wayland. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79768 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 12:52:36 +0000 beau-jolly 79768@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>You clever old pie! </p> <p>When Stella bought out the 4% version to combat the "Wife beater" reputation, it was instantly nicknamed "Wife saver". Tickled me. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79767 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 12:51:55 +0000 Golgo13 79767@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Love it. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=28527#post-79764 Fri, 29 Jul 2011 12:41:28 +0000 waylandsmithy 79764@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Alcohol fans were celebrating today, as Stella Artois added a further sheen of acceptability to day-time drinking. </p> <p>Stella are keen to build on the success of 'Cidre', a french-sounding apple-flavoured tramp fuel that now dominates the crucial town centre and bus shelter markets. But they don't want to alienate their core customers, and find themselves backed into a corner and begging for mercy.</p> <p>Marketing Director Peter Houghey is sure that the new 'wifebeatre lagre' will be a big hitter. "We all admire the French in this country. We love their chic style, their 'joie de vivre', their willingness to drink all day and abuse strangers."</p> <p>"We want to tap into those values, and claw back some of the ground we've recently lost to meths and Toilet Duck."</p> <p>The reassuringly strong drink is best served ice-cold, to neutralise any rogue flavour that may have crept in during transit. </p> <p>As Houghey explained, "The traditional 'hoppy' flavour can be a bit much at breakfast. Served cold, it goes better with cereals and makes a perfect ice pack for black eyes."</p> <p>Members of CAMRA have slammed the new drink, claiming the campaign is tasteless. But Houghey dismissed the criticism: "Most of that lot haven't even spoken to a girl. They're just being bittre." </p>