http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=2844 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Thu, 23 May 2013 11:34:27 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=2844#post-8435 Tue, 20 Apr 2010 07:37:23 +0000 theumpire 8435@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>"Ashen-faced" got me too! A well-earned 5, Lucidity. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=2844#post-8430 Tue, 20 Apr 2010 06:28:15 +0000 Ostsee 8430@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>..but he is relieved that James Bond is not longer employed. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=2844#post-8418 Mon, 19 Apr 2010 22:56:21 +0000 malgor 8418@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>'ashen-faced criminal mastermind' saw my literal sides split. 4* for 'ashen-faced' plus 1* for mastermind plug for Oxy. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=2844#post-8414 Mon, 19 Apr 2010 22:06:20 +0000 Ludicity 8414@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thanks all. Most lovely. </p> <p>And you are quite right JP. It was all just an elaborate excuse to do the Sooty gag. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=2844#post-8296 Mon, 19 Apr 2010 14:34:35 +0000 jp1885 8296@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>This sub is typical Ludicity rubbish, but I award it 5 points for calling the cat sooty. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=2844#post-8287 Mon, 19 Apr 2010 14:03:04 +0000 riesler 8287@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>his mood didn't improve when Sooty spent ten minutes fluffing up his leg with his claws, then walked round in circles five times and dribbled on his trouserleg. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=2844#post-8285 Mon, 19 Apr 2010 13:41:19 +0000 MightyBlair 8285@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>As always, absolutely brilliant. The static caravan is a tremendous inclusion. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=2844#post-8282 Mon, 19 Apr 2010 13:22:21 +0000 Ludicity 8282@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>International supervillain Ernst Stavro Blofeld is reportedly ‘hopping mad’ today after news that his plans for world domination could be set back by months due to problems with his secret volcano lair. </p> <p>‘The whole thing has really blown up in my face,’ said Blofeld, ‘I thought that we had the ideal location to take over the world, hidden away in an Icelandic volcano. But it’s completely impossible to work in there now. You can’t see a bloody thing.’</p> <p>Blofeld, who was hoping to achieve his dream of world domination by next Tuesday, is now adjusting to the fact that his dastardly plans could face major delays. ‘The whole project is already seriously over budget,’ said the ashen-faced criminal mastermind, ‘and the builders say that they can’t even look at the volcano until the middle of next week.’ </p> <p>‘If it’s not one thing, it’s another,’ said henchwoman Rosa Klebb, ‘although he’s only got himself to blame. If only he had stuck to the Giant Laser like I said, then we wouldn’t be in all this mess. But, oh no! He knew better. He thought he could build a Giant Lava Gun.’</p> <p>The problems with the volcano have also created major disruption to the day-to-day work of the global criminal organisation, SPECTRE. ‘Most of our operatives have been grounded for days,’ said agent Kronsteen, ‘I have been forced to postpone a number of high profile assassinations and this afternoon I was supposed to be stealing the warhead from a nuclear submarine. It looks like I will probably have to cancel that as well.’</p> <p>Blofeld, who is currently holed up in a static caravan just outside the volcano, vowed to continue. ‘I don’t give up that easily’ he said, stroking his cat Sooty, ‘if only I could devise some sort of evil scheme that would bring the world to a standstill.’ </p>