http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Wed, 19 Jun 2013 06:23:56 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-74061 Sat, 25 Jun 2011 09:54:03 +0000 FraserWords 74061@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Bugger. Should have thought of that! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-74059 Sat, 25 Jun 2011 09:52:46 +0000 Basil_B 74059@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Tell the kids there's carrot in the pie, that'll keep them off it. It would certainly work with my two little vegetable haters. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-74053 Sat, 25 Jun 2011 09:44:09 +0000 FraserWords 74053@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Well, it was a shambles. I put my pie and pint on the finishing line as planned, but the kids had the pie up on jacks and the crust off before I'd got back to the start line. Then, when I started running, the concussion caused by the weight of my flapping feet on the sodden turf caused the pint of Guinness to fall over, and I had to be led away to be comforted by Matron. Next year, there's always next year, as Andy Murray will say shortly. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-74024 Fri, 24 Jun 2011 23:00:09 +0000 Al OPecia 74024@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Super Dooper 5*. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-74022 Fri, 24 Jun 2011 22:58:49 +0000 Ironduke 74022@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Basil, thank you.</p> <p>In future I shall visualise myself as Regan chasing after a scrote.</p> <p>I shall be invincible. And I'll do a little commando roll at the end over a pretend car bumper </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-73908 Fri, 24 Jun 2011 11:11:32 +0000 Basil_B 73908@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Fortunately the school our kids go to have a parents race rather than just a dad's race which means I can deflect the humiliation on to my wife every year. I get out of it because i'm the one who has to come out of work to attend sports day and like Ironduke I don't want to be the one looking like a twat running in a shirt and tie.<br /> I'll leave that to Reagan and Carter in re-runs of the Sweeney (excuse the pun) </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-73905 Fri, 24 Jun 2011 10:50:52 +0000 Ironduke 73905@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Superb. My first experience with a dad's race was to turn up mid-morning in my work atire, brogue-footed, shirt and tie, and to look round at a collection of bastards in shorts and running shoes.<br /> I joined in, it was a bit damp, half way along my smooth soled shoes did a little skid, I just about held it without going arse over tit BUT there were questions from the kids as to why that man at the back did a funny little dance half away along. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-73808 Thu, 23 Jun 2011 19:02:43 +0000 Mary Evans 73808@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>My stepson goes to a rather posh private school. Every year the atrocious yummy mummies all gather to wear floaty skirts and sip Pimms while the au pair cheers on the kids. And then it's the mums race. Suddenly, the air is thick with Monsoon skirts being thrown through the air as they scrabble to the start line in their puma leggings and posh Nikes. All those hours spent with the personal trainer - some of them actually running - are put to the test as they claw each other out of the way over 100m. It is worth every minute of watching stupid, ugly rich kids balancing an egg on a spoon for two hours previously.</p> <p>And great sub Mr S xx </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-73652 Thu, 23 Jun 2011 09:30:52 +0000 ianslat 73652@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Cheers. No sports days until next year for me. Think I'll get in training now and be one of the competitive ones! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-73651 Thu, 23 Jun 2011 09:29:07 +0000 saltire 73651@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Like it Ian. Particularly the bit about '..dad snapping his hamstring..' Not that I'd wish that on anyone in real life.It's only a bit of fun after all.. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-73646 Thu, 23 Jun 2011 09:21:42 +0000 FraserWords 73646@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I'll let you know how I get on - VCG, you can have my little sods if you like? So long as you kept them topped up with chocolate, they wouldn't notice. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-73643 Thu, 23 Jun 2011 09:20:12 +0000 Rizzo 73643@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Great idea </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-73641 Thu, 23 Jun 2011 09:18:14 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 73641@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Like it. I'd be one of the competitive dads, but I'm not allowed to enter, what with not having children and everything. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-73634 Thu, 23 Jun 2011 09:10:05 +0000 FraserWords 73634@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>My boys' Sports Day tomorrow. I've got Dad's Race in the bag. I'm putting a pint of Guinness and a big pie on the finish line, and no bastard's getting there before me. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-73631 Thu, 23 Jun 2011 08:51:20 +0000 Oxbridge 73631@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I count not coming last in the dad's race among my major achievements of the year.</p> <p>Nice sub BTW. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-73629 Thu, 23 Jun 2011 08:49:35 +0000 Golgo13 73629@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Like it.</p> <p>I hate doing the dads' race, but #1 son is disappointed if I don't enter. It's nearly always oversubscribed, so I end up being put in the hastily improvised "second heat" for which there is no glory, and indeed, no interest from the spectators. They sense our discomfort and reluctance.</p> <p>whose </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=26837#post-73627 Thu, 23 Jun 2011 08:44:00 +0000 ianslat 73627@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Millions of disappointed Olympic ticket applicants were given fresh hope today as tickets for the dads' races at the London Olympics went on sale.</p> <p>'We realise that many people were disappointed not to get tickets for the proper Olympics' said Seb Coe, 'but the introduction of dad's races should more than make up for it. Tickets are available on a first-come-first-served basis for anyone wanting to watch the parents of world-class athletes embarrass themselves and their offspring in traditional British style.' Athletics fan Steve Merrigold agreed 'I was hoping to watch Usain Bolt in the men's 100m final, but I'll settle for seeing his dad in the 60ish yard dash.'</p> <p>Highlights of the new events are expected to be the British dad's relay team dropping the baton so tripping up the Germans to stop them winning, the cycling race being interrupted by a punch-up between two highly competitive dads and someone British's dad snapping his hamstring in two halfway through the 60 yard dash.</p> <p>The dad's events will be held in a bumpy old field somewhere in Essex, and competitors are expected to fall into two categories - dads who've bought new trainers for the event and have been running up and down their road for weeks and dads who's idea of preparation is a couple of cans of Fosters and a fag before the race starts. 'We're all hoping the pissed dads win of course' said Lord Coe. 'No-one likes to see those competitive tossers win do they.' </p>