http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552 The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Fri, 24 May 2013 23:47:41 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-29001 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 23:24:48 +0000 antharrison 29001@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Glanced at it, thought Ludicity.<br /> Proved right again.<br /> Great story. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-29000 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 22:23:16 +0000 deskpilot3 29000@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Hum.... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28981 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 18:34:42 +0000 Hunter F. Thompson 28981@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>5 </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28980 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 18:33:19 +0000 FormerlyAlOPecia 28980@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>"Supply Leader" genius, 5. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28974 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 17:31:44 +0000 Pabst Blue Ribbon 28974@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>How about the 'cough-bollocks' game? (have to say 'bollocks' louder than the last person without getting caught by sir...traditional to conceal the swear-word with a cough)</p> <p>And telling him we usually cut tax on alcohol on Mondays? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28947 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 15:53:55 +0000 virtuallywill 28947@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Excellent, you know it's a Front page. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28930 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 15:06:53 +0000 Oxbridge 28930@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I suspect you enjoyed writing the last paragraph just that little bit too much. 4.6. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28894 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 11:23:56 +0000 rickwestwell 28894@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Filppin' heck, Tucker! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28885 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 10:58:00 +0000 Sharpehunter 28885@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I'm sure that George (the sexy tom boy lesbo who was always rubbing up Dick and Jane the wrong way and running around on Kirrin Island naked with her dog Timmy) from Famous Five threw a sausage on a fork at a cornish smuggler to distract him while she nicked his torch.. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28881 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 10:53:37 +0000 jp1885 28881@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p><blockquote>someone throws a sausage on a fork. </blockquote><br /> If you've no idea what I'm on about - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hsMVEp3XtQQ&amp;feature=related">look about 20 seconds in</a> </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28871 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 10:36:30 +0000 Sharpehunter 28871@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Ahhhh... the good old 'sausage on a fork' random bit of tom foolery, straight out of the pages of Enid Blyton! Just beware that it doesn't have the same comedic value conducted at a Saudi beauracrat? They obviously have a different sense of humour.. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28852 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 10:00:23 +0000 Coldstream 28852@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I think someone went to the same school as me. Sounds like Mrs Morris' Geography lesson this. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28850 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 09:59:24 +0000 jp1885 28850@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Not me - I'm a girly swot - I prefer to point the sausage at get someone else to pull the trigger. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28841 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 09:05:31 +0000 Ludicity 28841@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Go on then. I dare you. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28840 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 09:03:55 +0000 jp1885 28840@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>4/5 - you will get an extra star if someone throws a sausage on a fork. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=10552#post-28838 Mon, 16 Aug 2010 09:00:53 +0000 Ludicity 28838@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>In his first week running the country Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg has suffered a major blow to his confidence as everyone in Britain began emitting a low frequency hum. </p> <p>‘Look, I know exactly what you are doing,’ said Mr Clegg in a televised address to the nation, ‘Just because Mr Cameron is away, you think that you can start mucking around. Well, you’ve had your fun, now get back to work.’</p> <p>In a series of ‘Town Hall meetings’ Mr Clegg travelled the country pleading with people to ‘settle down’, ‘be quiet’, and to ‘get on with the assignments left for you by Mr Cameron’. However, despite threatening 60 million people with lines and a detention, Mr Clegg was continually ignored and the humming continued. </p> <p>‘Look, this is just silly,’ said Mr Clegg, at yet another emergency press conference, adding ‘it’s your own time that you’re wasting.’ </p> <p>As tears welled up in the Deputy Prime Minister’s eyes, BBC political editor Nick Robinson jumped up from his seat and shouted, ‘Hey everyone, Clegg’s losing it!’ This was quickly followed by a trio of right wing hacks, Quentin Letts, Peter Oborne and Charles Moore, who began chanting from the back of the room, ‘Smeghead Clegg! Smeghead Clegg!’</p> <p>‘Stop it! Stop it once!’ screamed Mr Clegg, his voice now cracking as he struggled to be heard over the din. By now the press conference had descended into chaos with Mr Clegg’s proposals on constitutional reform now flying round the room in the form of paper darts. </p> <p>At one stage Mr Clegg turned his back and was smacked on the head by a soggy tampon. ‘Right! Who threw that?’ demanded Clegg, as the assembled journalists all looked down at their shoes. Unconfirmed reports suggest it was the work of Channel Four’s Gary Gibbon, but nobody confessed. </p> <p>Discipline was briefly restored with the arrival of Business Secretary Vince Cable, who stormed into the press conference and chastised the unruly nation with a lecture on fiscal prudence. However, once Mr Cable had left, the humming quickly resumed.</p> <p>Mr Clegg is now believed to be considering the ultimate sanction - a state of ‘national emergency’ in which the entire British population will have to queue up outside Buckingham Palace to be disciplined by the Queen. </p>