http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/tags.php?tag=newspaper The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Wed, 22 May 2013 08:39:04 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54123#post-156266 Fri, 04 Jan 2013 12:53:34 +0000 Oxbridge 156266@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thanks for input, Simon, I've spliced it together as best I can. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54123#post-156260 Fri, 04 Jan 2013 11:57:21 +0000 gregle 156260@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nice one. Made me laugh </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54123#post-156245 Fri, 04 Jan 2013 09:52:52 +0000 simonjmr 156245@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Here's my similar take onthis from last year - feel free to use any of it in the above.</p> <p><a href="http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38736" rel="nofollow">http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=38736</a> </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54123#post-156244 Fri, 04 Jan 2013 09:46:40 +0000 Dawsons creek 156244@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I thought that England won on the submarine-hindreds of dead method?</p> <p>I don't really understand this this doesnt seem to be just replacing one island name with another? I think it needs a better ending with a channel opening up. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54123#post-156243 Fri, 04 Jan 2013 09:44:37 +0000 Tripod 156243@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nice... works for me. ***** </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=54123#post-156241 Fri, 04 Jan 2013 09:39:42 +0000 Oxbridge 156241@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Argentinian president Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner has categorically refused to negotiate over the sovereignty of the Isle of Wight, despite the provocative behaviour of Britan's right-wing Coalitionista dictatorship, which recently put a full-page ad in El Diario de Buenos Aires asserting its claims to the barren island. </p> <p>Diplomats say this is the tensest stand-off since the two countries fought a brief war 30 years ago, which Argentina won on the Duckworth-Lewis method. La Isla Blanca, as it is known there, is a vital link in the South American nation's two-way trade with Europe in corned beef, polo ponies and ageing Nazis.</p> <p>'General Cameron is cynically trying to raise nationalistic fervour over this issue, because they are no longer able to distract the downtrodden British people since the X-Factor ended,' warned a UN-appointed mediator. 'However, Argentina's recent posting of its native-born singer Chris De Burgh to the island has also provoked justified anger in Britain.'</p> <p>In the recent ad, Britain denounced Argentina's 200-year possession of the Isle of Wight as a legacy of colonialism that should be corrected. Geographically, it claims, the Isle is part of Britain and could be reached in less than two hours from the abandoned port city of Southampton, in the unlikely event that anyone wanted to go there. </p> <p>The Isle of Wight is rumoured to have huge untapped reserves of clotted cream and, with heavy investment, it could rapidly be brought into the 1960s. Britain's ight-wing tabloids have urged the Coalitionistas to invade, scoffing at the very idea that a country on the other side of the world and led by a woman would fight back. Fernandez, however, dismisses this as reflecting the latent inadequacy of men in a country that has Katie Price as its icon of feminitity.</p> <p>'The future of the Isle of Wight is for the inhabitants alone to decide,' said President Fernandez. 'And, with no economic activity to speak of, constant harking back to an idealised but short-lived past and their prejudice against incomers despite being mostly immigrants themselves, they are clearly Argentine in every respect. We will use force if we must to save these poor people from the tinpot British regime, which should hopefully fall from power soon anyway.' </p> <p>[A joint effort with simonjmr. Hat tips to Sinnick and Dawsons creek. Recycled and updated from last time this was topical.] </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=24935#post-67660 Tue, 10 May 2011 20:10:03 +0000 ResidentAlien 67660@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>An orthodox Jewish-American newspaper has Photoshopped Hillary Clinton from the iconic image of Obama's team at the moment of Osama Bin Laden's death. Explaining their religious beliefs, a spokesman for the paper stated that leaving the American Secretary of State in full view would be "sexually suggestive".</p> <p>However, in a statement issued shortly after news of the circumcision leaked out, former President Bill Clinton dismissed the claim as "ridiculous" and added, "I fully support my wife's right to be seen with the other men."</p> <p>The White House later stated that it was illegal for anyone other than the CIA to alter an official photograph without permission.</p> <p><img src="http://images.bhaskar.com/web2images/www.dailybhaskar.com/2011/05/10/HILLARY-CLINTON-PHOTOSHOPPED.jpg"> </p>