http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/tags.php?tag=news The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Sat, 25 May 2013 10:09:42 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179364 Fri, 24 May 2013 09:52:36 +0000 bonjonelson 179364@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>what does "nom nom nom nom" mean in Thai? and how much does it cost? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179361 Fri, 24 May 2013 09:50:58 +0000 cinquecento 179361@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nom nom means 'little tit' in Thai </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179346 Fri, 24 May 2013 09:19:13 +0000 Al OPecia 179346@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>It's not his real name either, it's a non dom nom nom nom de plume. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179344 Fri, 24 May 2013 08:44:46 +0000 riesler 179344@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>If you are an ex-pat, is it a non dom nom nom? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179259 Thu, 23 May 2013 12:23:38 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 179259@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Can we add people with ginger hair? They really get on my tits. The dirty ginger bastards. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179208 Wed, 22 May 2013 21:54:40 +0000 Idiot 179208@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Too right. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179204 Wed, 22 May 2013 19:59:55 +0000 FlashArry 179204@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>So, so much anger </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179201 Wed, 22 May 2013 18:27:15 +0000 theinvisiblecitychannels 179201@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Can you also add anyone who says they are confused dot com. I hate these people, I hate them. I even refuse to type the domain. Ahhh. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179183 Wed, 22 May 2013 14:22:57 +0000 Idiot 179183@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Why stop there? If anyone sending a Purple Ronnie card had it sent straight back to them covered in dog shit this sort of infantile behaviour would soon die out. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179181 Wed, 22 May 2013 13:50:27 +0000 NorthernGravy 179181@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Come to think of it, he does. The bastard. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179177 Wed, 22 May 2013 13:42:44 +0000 Titus 179177@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Which is why he deserves the additional lashes. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179174 Wed, 22 May 2013 13:33:41 +0000 NorthernGravy 179174@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <br /> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179173 Wed, 22 May 2013 13:26:15 +0000 Titus 179173@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>The punishment includes an additional 20 lashes for writing "nom nom's" instead of "Nom noms", a simple plural. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61606#post-179171 Wed, 22 May 2013 13:22:29 +0000 NorthernGravy 179171@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>A 19 year old man from the Illingworth area of Halifax will be the first person to face a public lashing under the widely welcomed ‘nom nom’ law, introduced just yesterday.</p> <p>The new law, that strictly forbids the usage of the nauseating phrase, ‘nom nom’, generally used to express ones pleasure at eating, or the prospect of eating, delicious food, was put into force just yesterday. It was introduced following a 2 million-strong public petition submitted to Parliament last November.</p> <p>West Yorkshire police are yet to release the name of the offender, who is alleged to have updated his Facebook status with, ‘Plenty of nom nom’s at this buffet, I don’t know where to start! Nom nom!’</p> <p>Supporters of the new law have welcomed its early enforcement. Marion Hunt, who was one of the first people to sign the petition last September, said ‘The amount of smart phones I’ve smashed in rage after reading this infuriating phrase on Facebook is beyond belief. If it was up to me they’d be doing some serious porridge’. </p> <p>The public punishment, which will be aired live on BBC Three as a part of their new season - ‘N*m: The New ‘N’ Word’, will take place on June the 1st outside the Royal Courts of Justice, London. The punishment will consist of thirty public lashings from the offenders’ local MP.</p> <p>Linda Riordan MP, who will be delivering the historic stingers, was delighted when she received the call. ‘It’s a proud moment for me. I’ve always despised the phrase. For me, it’s on par with writing ‘sniff sniff’ when telling folk you have a cold – disgusting’.</p> <p>She added, ‘To be the first MP to really bring home the importance of this new law all over this young mans derriere is a real honour, and I plan to enjoy every second’. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61127#post-177547 Sat, 11 May 2013 06:54:16 +0000 weematt 177547@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Liked and +1'd. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61127#post-177534 Sat, 11 May 2013 05:37:43 +0000 Gerontius 177534@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Excellent.<br /> Heart warming tale indeed.<br /> And Wayne still puts in a shift at Spanners Are Us despite his windfall. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61127#post-177533 Sat, 11 May 2013 05:19:46 +0000 Golgo13 177533@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Compelling. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=61127#post-177523 Fri, 10 May 2013 23:24:35 +0000 Zipster 177523@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>An Essex mechanic suffering from a life-threatening illness has miraculously found the money for his treatment, thanks to a philanthropic gambling machine in his local betting shop.</p> <p>Wayne Bradley, a 23-year-old mechanic at Spanners Are Us in Braintree, was diagnosed with chronic lymphocytic leukaemia in 2012. Newly-imposed Government legislation means the NHS will only provide treatment for patients who are on Jobseeker's Allowance (JSA). Wayne needed £20,000 pounds for aggressive chemotherapy and a potential bone marrow transplant and although on sick leave from work, he couldn't be bothered to fundraise.</p> <p>Salvation appeared when Wayne hobbled in to his local William Hill betting shop and popped a coin into a gambling machine called a fixed-odds betting terminal, or FOBT. "I only stuck in a pound for a spin on the roulette game to try to forget the pain I was in; I'd been happy to win a fiver," recalls Wayne. The electronic unit then did something that no software engineer has been able to explain. "As soon as the coin dropped in the screen went completely black and then a message suddenly flashed up in big letters. It said it was sorry that I had leukaemia and that I did not deserve to die so young. It wanted me to be happy and marry my girlfriend, who it considered tasty and well worth a poke."</p> <p>Wayne then looked at the other customers in the shop, wondering if they were playing some sick joke. "No one looked at me; they were too busy betting on virtual pigeon racing. Then I heard the machine print a ticket and I quickly bent down and took it. It said 'Payout £20,000.' Then some more words flashed on the screen that I'll never forget. It said that everything will work out fine for me and Shazza and that I must go and get the treatment I need right away. There were three kisses and a heart at the bottom...it was bloody beautiful," says a welled up Wayne. He then staggered to the counter and presented the ticket to the cashier. "She was shocked that I'd won such a big amount. The maximum payout is meant to be £10,000 and a few customers had already won that much in the last month, but because I was a regular, she said she wouldn't check it with head office and then paid me the cash from the safe. It took about 30 minutes to count it and all and the other regulars were cheering and slapping me on the back. I ended up buying them all a Kit Kat and Coke. They may be jobless immigrants who can't speak British, but they're a great bunch."</p> <p>Wayne is now undergoing treatment for his leukaemia at a private clinic in London and still cannot believe his luck, saying: "That machine really did care about me. Technology is taking over our lives and one day we'll have artificially intelligent robots to be our slaves, but they'll never mean as much to me as that FOBT - it saved my life."</p> <p>A spokesman for William Hill issued the following statement: "I would like to congratulate Wayne on his massive win. He is a loyal customer and we are always pleased to give something back to those in need. However, I hope the empathy and largesse shown by this particular machine ends the snide and unhealthy innuendo by many, including politicians, that FOBTs are somehow not random and also damage our society." </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=14373&page=6#post-168447 Sun, 17 Mar 2013 09:23:17 +0000 Titus 168447@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p><em>Driving</em> a van? She <em>must</em> have a PhD.</p> <p>With a mere first degree, she would be just loading a van. If she was lucky. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=14373&page=6#post-168440 Sun, 17 Mar 2013 07:40:34 +0000 Truebiscuit 168440@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Sounds about right to me, Yikes. Most people who hide in university for years and years are completely useless in the real world. They just train to teach other people how to hide in university, the pointless twats. But driving vans? Everyone fucking loves parcels. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=14373&page=6#post-168439 Sun, 17 Mar 2013 07:31:19 +0000 Yikes 168439@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Probably right Perks - the link you gave says she is now available to train them.</p> <p>I find it a bit odd that as a Phd she is offering her services as data entry person and courier driver ... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=14373&page=5#post-168438 Sun, 17 Mar 2013 06:05:06 +0000 Perks 168438@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I believe there is even a suggestion she was trained as a private detective! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=14373&page=5#post-168437 Sun, 17 Mar 2013 03:26:22 +0000 Ironduke 168437@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Wow! Pretty comprehensive.</p> <p>Just wonder if the Cardinals considered her? Can't imagine a better candidate for Pope than her. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=14373&page=5#post-168436 Sun, 17 Mar 2013 02:31:30 +0000 Perks 168436@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nice to see her position of comma abuser has not been lost. Now baaring in mind she has a disability, look at all the stuff she is willing to do! <a href="http://ihubbub.com/pin/serious-satirical-dr-karen-j-stevens-phd" rel="nofollow">http://ihubbub.com/pin/serious-satirical-dr-karen-j-stevens-phd</a> </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=14373&page=5#post-168433 Sun, 17 Mar 2013 01:36:10 +0000 reforse 168433@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p><a href="http://stupidamazonreviews.wordpress.com/2012/12/04/dr-karen-j-stevens-phd-the-saviour-of-lives-msc-moaner-of-amazon-ba-aka-proud-scammer-from-the-university-of-life/">http://stupidamazonreviews.wordpress.com/2012/12/04/dr-karen-j-stevens-phd-the-saviour-of-lives-msc-moaner-of-amazon-ba-aka-proud-scammer-from-the-university-of-life/</a></p> <p>She has a diploma in Photography too </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=14373&page=5#post-168380 Sat, 16 Mar 2013 15:40:45 +0000 Nowherefast 168380@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I heard a rumour that Rebecca may somehow be involved in all of this </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=14373&page=5#post-168374 Sat, 16 Mar 2013 15:30:53 +0000 Not Amused 168374@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Ah... Welcome back to an old friend... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=14373&page=5#post-168371 Sat, 16 Mar 2013 15:25:37 +0000 bonjonelson 168371@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Is it two months already? At some point, bumping this will no longer be funny.</p> <p>But not yet. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=14218#post-158674 Fri, 18 Jan 2013 10:24:32 +0000 The All New Jeni B 158674@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>But not now, SoB. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=14218#post-158669 Fri, 18 Jan 2013 10:04:41 +0000 Son of Barnabas 158669@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I, think, I, need, to, back, up, my, brain, </p>