http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/tags.php?tag=midfield-works-where-i-do The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Wed, 19 Jun 2013 07:15:58 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55289#post-160289 Tue, 29 Jan 2013 14:24:41 +0000 Quaz 160289@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>So true. Stars.</p> <p>"How long will it take?"</p> <p>"We don't know, we've never done it before, need to find out where to even begin and hire the right people, but the salesman told the client 3 months after he had rather good lunch, the project manager will push that out by a few months, and it will take a least a year." </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55289#post-160285 Tue, 29 Jan 2013 14:15:11 +0000 Midfield Diamond 160285@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thanks for the comments, how did I miss out Why You Can Never Have Enough Pie Charts...? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55289#post-160275 Tue, 29 Jan 2013 14:03:16 +0000 Vertically Challenged Giant 160275@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Nice. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55289#post-159876 Sat, 26 Jan 2013 14:49:27 +0000 Squudge 159876@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Sorry - I have to send this back for review as you haven't used the correct template nor do I see the accompanying powerpoint slide pack.</p> <p>Stars. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55289#post-159803 Sat, 26 Jan 2013 00:26:08 +0000 Sir Lupus 159803@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Another great conference to go to! I'm thinking of submitting a paper on Celebrating Lots Of Graphs That Are Based On Effectively Made-Up Figures. But the conference needs a theme - given the rescheduling, IAPM Conference 2013: Back to the Future? </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55289#post-159796 Fri, 25 Jan 2013 23:24:27 +0000 custard cream 159796@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>I feel your pain! - Top marks for top sub. Reward the guilty, condemn the innocent! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55289#post-159767 Fri, 25 Jan 2013 14:56:08 +0000 FlashArry 159767@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>... has our conference room been bugged again ? </p> <p>Five stars, but you missed out all the bollocks on Progress Monitoring Sprints and Scrums ... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55289#post-159765 Fri, 25 Jan 2013 14:55:08 +0000 Tripod 159765@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>...And relax... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=55289#post-159763 Fri, 25 Jan 2013 14:49:26 +0000 Midfield Diamond 159763@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>The Annual Conference for Programme Management professionals, originally scheduled for June 2013, is now to take place in March. It is understood that Conference organisers The International Association of Programme Managers (IAPM) heard that the conference venue in Brighton had had a cancellation, so a unilateral decision was made by IAPM Chairman Robert German to book that slot instead. An updated invitation for papers has therefore been issued with the new closing date of yesterday.</p> <p>“Some of the speakers we’ve already booked have described the new date as ‘impossible to achieve’ but I prefer the word ‘challenge’,” said Mr German. “As a Programme Manager myself, it is in my nature to shorten timescales at the expense of doing things properly.”</p> <p>Amongst the subjects for debate at the Conference are Ignoring Advice About How Long It Will Take And How Much It Will Cost, Taking Twenty Percent Off All Budgets Because It Will Save Money, How Daily Written Progress Reports Can Help When Things Are Not Going Well, Painting An Unrealistic Picture That Shows All In The Garden Is Rosy To Upper Management and How To Blame Everyone Else But Programme Management For A Late And Overspent Programme.</p> <p>“I’m looking forward enormously to the Conference,” exclaimed Mr German. “It’s a great opportunity to do what we do best – sit around in meetings talking bollocks about timescales and budgets while others are actually doing the work. We’ll also have a laugh about Programme Managers being able to deliver a baby in one month by impregnating nine girls,” he added, “even though I can’t see why that shouldn’t be achievable.”</p> <p><em>Yes, that is the voice of recent experience, glad I got it off my chest</em> </p>