http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/tags.php?tag=lib-dem The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Sat, 25 May 2013 01:58:09 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34266#post-96861 Sat, 19 Nov 2011 17:27:15 +0000 Clarky 96861@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Yes. Go for it. How will the judging be done? Will the great British public be able to televote? What will the dosh generated be used for? How have GPs reacted to the news? Loads of potential. Good luck. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34266#post-96844 Sat, 19 Nov 2011 14:50:03 +0000 waylandsmithy 96844@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>That's a great bit of work, nice one! Funny too, which helps. </p> <p>The Stephen Hawking reference is inspired! I don't know who Jessie Jay is, which means he/she is either a football player, or a contestant/judge on X Factor/I'm a Dancer Get me a Brother. But that's not a fault with the sub. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34266#post-96839 Sat, 19 Nov 2011 14:11:12 +0000 mpaterson 96839@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Okay, I'll leave it at that I think. I've got to go an collect a second hand cooker for someone now. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34266#post-96837 Sat, 19 Nov 2011 13:44:53 +0000 waylandsmithy 96837@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Just a guide! NiBs (news in brief) are typically 150 words, FPs anywhere from 350 to 450. But bear in mind its easier for an editor to cut than add, so going slightly over isn't a major issue. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34266#post-96833 Sat, 19 Nov 2011 13:17:06 +0000 mpaterson 96833@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>150 words. Okay. I'll take that advice of focusing on quality over quantity too. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34266#post-96830 Sat, 19 Nov 2011 13:05:52 +0000 waylandsmithy 96830@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>If I might make a suggestion, it's worth spending a bit of time on one sub and making sure you're really happy with it before posting it, rather than submitting lots of good ideas with no development. This idea is a great place to start, if you can write a tight 150 words it'll easily make it as a NiB. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34266#post-96829 Sat, 19 Nov 2011 12:56:03 +0000 mpaterson 96829@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Okay I shall, thanks! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34266#post-96826 Sat, 19 Nov 2011 12:49:16 +0000 waylandsmithy 96826@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Great idea, definitely worth expanding to at least NiB length, but easy to extend further and try for an FP. Go on, give it some thought! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=34266#post-96823 Sat, 19 Nov 2011 12:32:31 +0000 mpaterson 96823@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>People's fitness for work is to be judged by Independent Television (ITV) hosted by Jeremy Kyle. Tasks will include 'standing up from a seated position' and 'rubbing your tummy whilst patting your head'.</p> <p>It's hoped the show will produce another Stephen Hawking. Kyle even enthused 'we're passionate about taking ordinary people and giving them the chance to shine people's shoes or office toilets.'</p> <p>The Show, 'Britain's Got Lazy' will be judged by Lord Tebbit, Jessie Jay and a Brick Wall. When asked why she wanted to be a judge, Jessie said, 'bit of a laugh really, plus I get to sit down a lot'. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=9578#post-25989 Mon, 02 Aug 2010 14:22:39 +0000 Zadok the second 25989@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Welcome to you Chris, first post and already in contention for a front page, I'd say. </p> <p>Here is a perfect test of the 'this site's an unhealthy cliquefest and doesn't welcome new talent' moan... </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=9578#post-25928 Mon, 02 Aug 2010 10:06:33 +0000 ChrisHarrison 25928@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Cheers guys, really appreciate the encouragement.</p> <p>Chris </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=9578#post-25922 Mon, 02 Aug 2010 09:20:25 +0000 arrghgarry 25922@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>you must be a pillar of virtue in the Commons, and a whore in the bedroom.” Unfortunately, he has done the exact opposite.’nice5 </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=9578#post-25917 Mon, 02 Aug 2010 08:50:11 +0000 Mary Evans 25917@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Very nice, Mr Harrison. Points alordy for PMILFs! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=9578#post-25915 Mon, 02 Aug 2010 08:34:37 +0000 ChrisHarrison 25915@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Following his decision to join forces with the Conservatives, Lib Dem leader, Nick Clegg, has seen his sexual attractiveness plummet.</p> <p>The Facebook group, ‘Nick Clegg? I would’ has seen its membership drop by 40% in the last three months. Coming so soon after the giddy highs of the leadership debates, this will be seen as a personal disaster for Mr Clegg.</p> <p>Former Lib Dem leader and fellow thinking women’s crumpet, Lord Ashdown, said, ‘I have known little Nicky since he was a wee young devil and I know he will be devastated by this news. I remember saying to him once, “Nick, if you want to succeed in this life, you must be a pillar of virtue in the Commons, and a whore in the bedroom.” Unfortunately, he has done the exact opposite.’</p> <p>Experts now believe that the coalition has taken on even greater importance for Mr Clegg. If it collapses and another General Election is called, the Liberal Democrats may actually suffer as a result of the worsening online profile and reduced attractiveness of their leader. </p> <p>Political commentator and social media expert, sexyprof54, said, ‘Sexiness has long been an important asset in politics. From Anthony Eden to Margaret Thatcher and more recently, Tony Blair, people have always sought to elect PMILFs. It is scientifically proven that we would rather a beautiful person screwed up our country than a grotesquely ugly one.</p> <p>‘In more recent times, social media has played a greater role in elections. It is commonly accepted that had Barack Obama not embraced social networking, there is little doubt that John McCain would now be in the White House. There is no other explanation for Mr Obama’s victory, apart from his extreme sexiness obviously. Indeed, the Democrats were in the wonderful position of choosing between the very sexy Obama or the very sexy Hillary Clinton, so either way they were sure to win.’</p> <p>The reversal in Mr Clegg’s fortunes is as swift and dramatic as the surge in popularity he enjoyed during the pre-Election leadership debates. Back then, the forums were awash with women flushed with animal lust (or possibly the menopause) for the Lib Dem love god.</p> <p>Many of his admirers are now too embarrassed to speak out, but one brave lady, henmaniac1965, did write on her wall, ‘When he looked straight down that camera lens and spoke to the nation, it was like he was ravishing me with his eyes. Ooh, he could be as Liberal as he liked with me! I haven’t felt that giddy since Tiger Tim last pumped his fist at SW19. Now, Nick Clegg? I certainly would not!’</p> <p>Hot on the heels of his Party’s poor showing in a recent poll, Mr Clegg is said to be increasingly desperate to reverse his fortunes, and has reportedly pleaded with Rebekah Brooks to let him appear as a Page 7 Fella in tomorrow's Sun (‘tackle out if it helps’). </p> <p>Reports that Mr Clegg has cancelled the print run of his 2011 calendar can not be confirmed. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=3164#post-9062 Fri, 23 Apr 2010 19:03:31 +0000 MightyBlair 9062@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>The Liberal Democrats faced stern examination today after Nick Clegg announced a series of new policies whilst campaigning in Newcastle. Clegg promised voters at Newcastle Airport that he would make hangovers illegal, force the tooth fairy to double payments and make sure every year was a white Christmas. ‘It’s a long shot,’ stated Clegg, ‘but I have a dream of a Britain where magic can happen’. </p> <p>Yet, the Lib Dem leader did concede that it may take a while to forge this Brave New World, ‘we’re in a pickle as it stands, and we are going to have to work hard to reach that pot of gold’. When asked about his economic plans for the coming term should he be elected, Clegg stated that he and Vince Cable are looking at a number of changes to the current taxation system, a scheme to reclaim the funds invested in the stricken banking system, and are ‘in discussions with Jesus regarding whether he would consider returning to die for our financial sins’. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=2301#post-6748 Fri, 09 Apr 2010 18:32:10 +0000 Stan Laurel 6748@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>After months of behind the scenes wrangling, Charles Kennedy has called time on his membership of the Liberal Democrats by announcing the formation of a breakaway political party in time for the General Election.</p> <p>“The new ‘Bring a Bottle Party’, will bring some back the fun to the political landscape,” an emotional Mr Kennedy told a surprised audience at a Liberal Democrat fund raising event at his Ross, Skye and Lochaber constituency. </p> <p>Rising unsteadily to his feet, the former Lib Dem leader said “I have spent quite a lot of my political career researching, mixing with the public and all that stuff, and will try to represent their interests, and mine, which seem to be mainly confined to drinking, err, supporting one of our great industries.”</p> <p>Warming to his theme, Mr Kennedy listed his new party’s policies. “Firstly I want to make it quite clear that we are going to be responsible. We will rigidly enforce the current drinking age of 18. Because I for one, am fed up to the back teeth of having to queue for a dram behind all those bloody kids.” </p> <p>“My new party will not shy away from making tough decisions,” he continued. “Red or white, beer or larger, blended or malt? You will be able to count on us to make these vital choices on your behalf.”</p> <p>Although Mr Kennedy was vague about how many members of the Liberal Democratic Party were likely to join the BBP, the former leader was later overheard extolling the virtues of one former colleague “I’m going to call my mate Lembit Optic, erm, Opik. He’s my best pal. Maybe he’ll let me borrow a cheeky girl.”</p> <p>A Liberal Democrat insider said last night that the split had been brewing for some time. </p>