http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/tags.php?tag=apostrophe The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Fri, 24 May 2013 18:28:46 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=24220#post-65794 Fri, 22 Apr 2011 19:36:32 +0000 euanc 65794@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Regular Archers listeners were surprised to hear GQT panel members debating the space/time coordinate grid spanning the 3+1 dimensions locating events rather than just points in space. Presenter Eric Robson explained “ Gardeners are as entitled to question current hypothetical models of the temporal nature of the universe as any other interest group.” </p> <p>Bob Flowerdew, the organic gardening wizz expounded his own views, “The Space/Time super dimension can be conceptualized as a patch of nettles entirely surrounded by dock leaves. Nature achieves its own balance without our interference.”</p> <p>Pippa Greenwood took a more scientific view, “A mathematical model which differs from Euclidean space in its manifest symmetry can be just as satisfying an explanation as any pseudo scientific organic mumbo jumbo.’</p> <p>Residents of Ambridge expressed disappointment, “ I’ve had problems with my hilariously deformed root vegetables for many years,” said Joe Grundy, ”I had hoped to find some satisfaction with Bunny Guinness but she only wanted to discuss non-mathematical notions of unified spacetime.”</p> <p>Professor Stephen Hawkins was on gardening leave and unavailable for comment but a spokesperson for the BBC explained, “Bloody apostrophes, just miss one out and look where you get.” </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=3203#post-9320 Mon, 26 Apr 2010 06:10:59 +0000 rfreed 9320@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Thompson! You're right! They've got me cornered in my apartment! You might be the only one who knows my fate! Let the world know what happened! Please!!<br /> Ghaaaaack......!!!!!!! </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=3203#post-9260 Sun, 25 Apr 2010 17:03:21 +0000 Ostsee 9260@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Palinomics: the way to permanent, irreversible deflation. Vatican approved. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=3203#post-9202 Sun, 25 Apr 2010 07:51:48 +0000 Hunter F. Thompson 9202@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>The Apostrophe People will be shooting your headline if you don't fix the false possessive. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=3203#post-9201 Sun, 25 Apr 2010 07:10:21 +0000 rfreed 9201@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Sarah Palin, potential candidate for the Presidency in 2012, has put in a complaint with the Alaskan State Troopers complaining of Russians peeping in her windows at night. As she once claimed that she “could see Russia from her window”; apparently they can see her as well. Perhaps more of her than she would care for. </p> <p>“Ah, this here's 'Peeping Ivan's' lookin' in mah windows at night!” stated the former Governor of Alaska in an interview at WASP News Radio in Wasilla, Alaska. “Golly, I don't know what they're up to! Are they tryin' to get some vital National Security secrets from me or just tryin' to see if its only the grizzlies that have brown fur? Either way, it gives me the creeps. I lit out after them a couple of times and torched their butts with some rock salt from mah double barrel. Todd set out a couple of bear traps and, sure enough, the next day there was one of them funny Ruskie fur hats in one and part of some really cheap leather boots in another. I'm not so worried about them seein' me nekkid; I mean I see those lard butt women they got in their country and I can sympathize that they want to see some truly luscious voluptuous American flesh, but what if they start peeping in on Bristol? Last thing I need is for her to start poppin' out some Russian half-breeds on me. And the second to last thing I need is to find nudie shots of me in various states of showering in some Soviet porn site. No, thanky you!"</p> <p>The US. Secret Service has been sent out from Washington to watch vigil over the possible future presidents house. Unfortunately, some of them have been getting cheap thrills by taking peeks themselves. </p> <p>“What do you expect?” stated one agent who refused to identify himself for fear of losing his job. “We're sent up here thousands of miles away from our wives and loved ones to a place where we have to stand around all day in minus 30 degree weather looking buff and observant. Of course we're going to peek in at the only good looking woman around for 30 miles! Damn right we are!” He then pulled his gun and shot our reporter. </p>