http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/tags.php?tag=ann-coulter The NewsBiscuit Community en-US Tue, 21 May 2013 11:47:01 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/search.php http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=2803#post-8215 Mon, 19 Apr 2010 03:23:10 +0000 MightyBlair 8215@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Very funny, especially second time through. </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=2803#post-8207 Mon, 19 Apr 2010 02:03:13 +0000 rfreed 8207@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>Extreme Right wingnut Ann Coulter new telephone 'Dial-A Skank' business venture began its services yesterday. Offering 24 hour titillation to the lusty imaginations of millions of potential far right callers, the phone lines are already going non-stop.<br /> The new call in service offers Ms. Coulter's own brand of acid, Kama Sutral, liberal bashing delight to her supporters as she explores the forbidden libido of desire that lurks in the dark recesses of many arch conservative minds. Annes own breathy voice delivers the sexy, steamy innuendo as evidenced in this outtake:<br /> “I have Micheal Moore tied spread eagle on a bed face down. I am pulling down his pants, slowly exposing his ample hiney. I strip the belt out of his pants, then bring it slashing down upon the monumental exposed flesh. As he screams out in pain I say “Tell Mommy that you have been a bad liberal! Tell me!” I then lash ever widening arcs upon his bottom.”<br /> Coulter also includes phone spots from other famous conservative media demigods such as Glenn Beck- “I have Nancy Pelosi tied to a 17th century witches dunking stool stripped down to her bra and panties. I am making her read aloud Ronald Reagan's autobiography. Anytime she mispronounces a word I dunk her in the water and haul her out. Her white, tender flesh has goose bumps all over it from the cold and the excitement. Actually, so do I!”<br /> Sean Hannity has his input too- “I have Al Gore straddled across my lap with his pants pulled down. I raise my paddle and as I bring it down upon his quivering, expectant buttocks I say “Tell me about global warming! Tell me about the polar bears dying! I want to hear it again.” (It was noticed that Mr. Hannity seems to get a little too much pleasure out of his performance and his beady eyes and insinuating smile are more beady and insinuating than usual.)<br /> But it is Anne herself who keeps things going with her genuine sexy, fascist attitudes and repugnance for all things even remotely leftist- “I have Bill Clinton chained up spread out naked upon a bear skin rug in front of a roaring fire. I take out a cigar, sniff it's robust aroma, and then….”Extreme Right wingnut Ann Coulter new telephone 'Dial-A Skank' business venture began its services yesterday. Offering 24 hour titillation to the lusty imaginations of millions of potential far right callers, the phone lines are already going non-stop.<br /> The new call in service offers Ms. Coulter's own brand of acid, Kama Sutral, liberal bashing delight to her supporters as she explores the forbidden libido of desire that lurks in the dark recesses of many arch conservative minds. Annes own breathy voice delivers the sexy, steamy innuendo as evidenced in this outtake:<br /> “I have Micheal Moore tied spread eagle on a bed face down. I am pulling down his pants, slowly exposing his ample hiney. I strip the belt out of his pants, then bring it slashing down upon the monumental exposed flesh. As he screams out in pain I say “Tell Mommy that you have been a bad liberal! Tell me!” I then lash ever widening arcs upon his bottom.”<br /> Coulter also includes phone spots from other famous conservative media demigods such as Glenn Beck- “I have Nancy Pelosi tied to a 17th century witches dunking stool stripped down to her bra and panties. I am making her read aloud Ronald Reagan's autobiography. Anytime she mispronounces a word I dunk her in the water and haul her out. Her white, tender flesh has goose bumps all over it from the cold and the excitement. Actually, so do I!”<br /> Sean Hannity has his input too- “I have Al Gore straddled across my lap with his pants pulled down. I raise my paddle and as I bring it down upon his quivering, expectant buttocks I say “Tell me about global warming! Tell me about the polar bears dying! I want to hear it again.” (It was noticed that Mr. Hannity seems to get a little too much pleasure out of his performance and his beady eyes and insinuating smile are more beady and insinuating than usual.)<br /> But it is Anne herself who keeps things going with her genuine sexy, fascist attitudes and repugnance for all things even remotely leftist- “I have Bill Clinton chained up spread out naked upon a bear skin rug in front of a roaring fire. I take out a cigar, sniff it's robust aroma, and then….” </p> http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=880#post-2253 Sat, 13 Mar 2010 18:44:03 +0000 rfreed 2253@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/ <p>The Republican Party in conjunction with FOX News is celebrating their collaborative publishing effort, a new book called 'Everything We Need To Know About Politics We Learned In Kindergarten'. Its publication has started such a buying frenzy among their constituents who can read that it rivals the success had by the coming out of Sarah Palin's 'Going Rogue'. The pundits of both groups are partying like its 1899.<br /> Select chapters from the book include:<br /> 101 Seemingly Innocent Ways to Get People's Attention And Keep It.<br /> Playground Power Techniques- How To Use Muscle And Mouth In Ways That The Teacher Doesn't Notice.<br /> How To So Bamboozle People That You Can Make Them Think That Dirty Diapers Are Really Clean.<br /> Using Fibs To Play With People's Heads.<br /> How to Whine Without Seeming Like Whining.<br /> Learning To Inflict Guilt To Get What You Want.<br /> How To Hold Your Breath Until You Get Your Way.<br /> Special Glenn Beck Section:<br /> The Value Of Tears In Gaining Sympathy.<br /> The Fine Art Of Putting Down People To Make You Look Smart.<br /> Acting Cute WILL Get You Somewhere!<br /> Special Ann Coulter Section:<br /> Gaining Prestige By Making Someone Else Look Bad So That You Look Good.<br /> How To Make Tirades And Tantrums Look Like Educated, Intelligent Discourse.<br /> Being A True Bitch Can Be Profitable.<br /> The Repubs claim that using the insights given in this book will give one the talent to take control and move into the power zone in any American societal or political environment that one finds oneself. The methods needed to keep that power are laid out in a book put out by the same publisher called 'The Prince- Part II' by selected senior conservative correspondents with references to Machiavelli. The new Prince refreshes ideas presented in the original giving them a modern tone. All proceeds from both books will be used to build Ceasarian palaces on a Saddam-like scale for the leaders of the Republican Party who will be taking over in 2012.<br /> Breaking News!!!- Roger Fulghum, author of the bestseller Everything I Needed To Know About Life I Learned From Kindergarten.' is suing the conservatives for stealing ideas from his book, including the concept. Mr. Fulghum is currently at work on a new volume entitled 'I Wish To Hell They Had Taught Me Something About The Legal Business in Kindergarten'. </p>