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Ofcom rules that Clarkson is "not justified by context". 0
Crayon 3 days
Queen to auction off some Commonwealth countries 9
IABP 2 3 days

The Queen has been having a clear out recently and wants to put some of the Commonwealth up for auction. She admits to being a bit of a hoarder and didn't realise she had half of these countries....

Russia World Cup Ban Ridiculed. Clegg 'Politics is not his strongest subject' 0
Dun Dunkin 3 days
Bell ends playing for England Cricket Team 6
richard_n413 3 days
Passport Office bids to win Westminster net migration sweepstake 0
cinnahmon 3 days

It was revealed today by an anonymous source at the Office of National Statistics that the current strike of passport workers was an underhand attempt by officials at the Home Office to win a secret...

Positions Vacant: Opposition Party. Previous Applicants Need Not Re-Apply. 0
Titus 3 days
Lethal injection "now ineffective enough to be sold over counter" 0
sydalg 3 days
Prince George Rules Lego World With an Iron Fist 2
SimonJJames 3 days

The Queen, Prince Charles and the rest of the Royal Family were said to be delighted today when an official video showed the young prince ruling his Lego kingdom with an authoritarian zeal unseen...

Operation Yewtree: Shock as Morph and Basil Brush Brought In For Questioning 0
SimonJJames 3 days

Shock and outrage today as childhood icons, Morph and Basil Brush, were separately questioned by Operation Yewtree officers working. Morph was taken to an Oxfordshire Police Station but has not been...

Ed Balls regrets suggesting a bit of slap and tickle 0
cinnahmon 3 days
Alzheimers Handicap Chase - latest betting 0
ESJ 3 days

Mr Thingy 3/1 Favourite, Mr Wotsit 7/2, Thingummy 5/1, I'll have it soon 13/2, Where am I 10/1, Damn it's gone again 12/1...

Tony Blair awarded Vagisil Prize for most offensive twat on the planet 0
pere floza 3 days
1962 Andy Williams song to be played imminently 0
Bravenewmalden 3 days

'More' soon...

Top Gear on slippery slope warn Ofcom 0
cinnahmon 3 days
Amazing Scenes at WOMAD as Bermudan trinagle player vanishes during performance. 0
Thundi 3 days
Scottish Call Girls Win Gold Medals During 'Games Bonanza' 0
Dun Dunkin 3 days

"Its not been this busy since the EU meeting came here"...

Scottish voters split between the 'Och Aye' and 'The Noo' campaigns. 0
Boutros 3 days
Hopes for commonwealth 800m medals dashed 0
Bigglesworth 3 days
Miliband Says He Needs Help From The public In Asking Cameron Questions 2
Titus 3 days
Dinosaurs 'Failed To Deal With Climate Change' Say Friends Of Green Earthpiece 0
Titus 3 days
Plant suicide rate rockets in Phil Neville's green house, return home blamed 0
Thundi 3 days
Hogwart's finally goes on line with Wiccapedia. 0
Maverick 4 days
Israel Gaza conflict now long running enough to be star trek alegory 0
Bigglesworth 4 days
Death row prisoners developing resistance to execution 10
Mandy Lifeboat 4 days

The penal system in the US could soon be ‘cast back into the dark ages’ unless action is taken to tackle the growing threat of resistance to execution, experts have said. In a preliminary report...

Eric Pickles back to pre-recession size 0
apepper 4 days

More to follow...

Stephen Hawkins To Be Redesigned By Sir Jonathan Ive 7
SimonJJames 4 days

In a joint announcement from Cambridge University and Apple, Stephen Hawking is to be redesigned by Sir Jonathan Ive. “iHawkin”, as he is to be known, will benefit from a complete look and feel...

WOMAD: Russian balalaika troupe knock Malaysian gamelan ensemble off World Stage 0
Crayon 4 days

More global harmony soon...

Insensitive timing of Didcot towers demolition blasted 1
Kevin the Swan 4 days

Photographers everywhere were said to be 'really quite upset' today after three Didcot power station cooling towers were demolished at 5am on Sunday by some inconsiderate bastard. Colin Talbot, an...

Clegg clarifies plans to hold 2018 Word Cup at Eton 1
antharrison 4 days

Initially Nick Clegg’s plan to deprive Russia of hosting the 2018 Word Cup were met with ridicule because no credible alternative was presented, but now he has revealed detailed plans for them to...

76% Of Scotland To Say Yes, Unsure Of Question 0
SimonJJames 4 days

The Yes vote in Scotland received fresh impetus when pollsters realised that those asked were positive but unsure of the question being asked., In a poll of 143 people in 4 cities in Scotland over...