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McDonalds panic after cafe owner jailed for selling unhealthy meal 0
sockpuppet 23.05.16 10:37pm
sockpuppet
Diet Coke the most refreshing way to give yourself cancer

Drinking huge quantities of Diet Coke is easily the most refreshing way to get cancer, it has emerged. Reacting to health concerns over sweeteners used in the drink, Coca-Cola bosses have explained...

3
Matt Ward 23.05.16 9:18pm
Matt Ward
Environmentalists to change their method of executing non-believers

An emissary for the Most Reverend Father and Patriarch of the Holy Church of Environmentalism has announced that, at a recent international convocation and prayer gathering, it had been revealed to...

21
sockpuppet 23.05.16 9:17pm
Dodderer
Ragged, homeless, starving Brits say 'You see? Brexit was a success!'

'So much for all the dire warnings' said former city trader Justin DeNile, huddling in the burnt-out wreckage of his Porsche where he now lives among the rubble of ruins in the City of London, after...

0
sockpuppet 23.05.16 8:37pm
sockpuppet
Treasury brainstorming meetings for media headlines fueled by legal highs

more giggling later...

1
Dun Dunkin 23.05.16 8:09pm
sockpuppet
Latest Brexit advice on EU: 'If it's broken, dump it.' 0
sockpuppet 23.05.16 8:07pm
sockpuppet
Latest diet advice: deep-fried Mars Bars OK provided they're not low-fat.

More high-bullshit diet advice soon ...

0
sockpuppet 23.05.16 8:05pm
sockpuppet
Names of satirists must not be revealed, rules court of appeal

An application by a singer, his so-called 'husband' and a third vegetable-oil enthusiast for the names to be revealed of various satirists who have been taking the piss out of them, has been turned...

2
sockpuppet 23.05.16 8:02pm
sockpuppet
Brexit Debate - Children, play nicely 1
Wrexfan 23.05.16 7:54pm
sockpuppet
Brentrance campaign already underway.

Campaigners worried that the British public will vote to leave the EU have already started making plans to re join the EU...

0
carlosmanwelly 23.05.16 7:34pm
carlosmanwelly
Van Gaal sacked for only narrowly beating Palace

Manchester United have dismissed manager Louis Van Gaal after his team failed to thoroughly thrash a tinpot team in the FA Cup Final. The humiliation of beating Crystal Palace by just a single goal,...

4
Midfield Diamond 23.05.16 7:32pm
Midfield Diamond
Emergency education fund for war zones good news for northern schools. More soon 0
dominic_mcg 23.05.16 6:50pm
dominic_mcg
Mourhino sacked by Man U for not winning Premier League yet. More soon. 0
Al OPecia 23.05.16 6:19pm
Al OPecia
Classic Wembley FA Cup show of 2016 passes into legend as The Clattenburg Final

Can you remember where you were on May 21 2016? Whether you were on a grassy knoll in Texas, in the middle of a Tsunami or just plain moon landing, everyone remembers exactly what they were doing...

3
ronseal 23.05.16 5:29pm
nickb
Lads’ nights out becoming far too risk-averse, says former lad

A 72 year-old former lad has become increasingly concerned at the reluctance of young men to take more risks on a lads’ night out. Retired pub landlord Phillip Brown from Kent feels betrayed by...

0
jonessgl 23.05.16 3:35pm
jonessgl
Curry houses fear 'ring of fire' assault charges

While most curry house owners have little sympathy for the restaurateur who replaced almonds for peanuts and ended up killing a customer, many are now concerned that the litigation happy environment...

0
throngsman 23.05.16 12:40pm
throngsman
South-West trains cheese slicing dept take delivery of new electron microscope 0
NotNowCato 23.05.16 12:02pm
NotNowCato
Stronger, safer, better off...and full of cock

Noit's not the new Durex advertit's the new IN campaign slogan...

0
Gerontius 23.05.16 10:53am
Gerontius
Vardy will have to be sold to China if Brexit 0
Dun Dunkin 23.05.16 10:17am
Dun Dunkin
Never in the field of voting have so many lies been told to so many by so few 0
Dun Dunkin 23.05.16 10:16am
Dun Dunkin
MP tells teenage sons voting for Brexit will cause blindness. 0
Loundshay 23.05.16 9:43am
Loundshay
Experts differ on which Becket bone has returned - can't tell ass from elbow 0
Wrexfan 23.05.16 9:24am
Wrexfan
PM concerned Brexit will cause half a million job losses, including his own 0
bookiesfriend 23.05.16 9:13am
bookiesfriend
It's 1939: WW II referendum 'Could go either way'

The pacifists claim that going to war could cost this country several thousands, if not millions, of pounds, leaving everyone in Britain severely out-of-pocket, and that we may even end up having to...

0
sockpuppet 23.05.16 8:28am
sockpuppet
Lesbians furious about being left out of BGT. More soon. 4
dominic_mcg 23.05.16 8:25am
ronseal
Ultratech, Northeastern to Collaborate for Nanomaterial Research

CaF2 Windows SAN JOSE, Calif., Might 20, 2016 -- Lithography as well as laser beam program provider Ultratech Inc. offers introduced the investigation effort along with tutor Jones T. Webster from...

0
jayjoe1010 23.05.16 3:18am
jayjoe1010
Brexit:The Musical

Following on from the success of launching a National Referendum, David Cameron has teamed up with Conservative Peer, Lord Lloyd Webber to produce a musical version of the debate. "Just putting a...

0
throngsman 22.05.16 8:48pm
throngsman
Staffie that bit 11 kids 'not a real staffie', says staffie community leader 1
cinquecento 22.05.16 8:24pm
sockpuppet
NHS prepares to treat thousands of patients covered in boils following Brexit 0
sockpuppet 22.05.16 8:06pm
sockpuppet
England's name already engraved on trophy following win over Turkey. More soon. 0
dominic_mcg 22.05.16 6:44pm
dominic_mcg