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Mr Darcy gets arsey at BAFTA party.

Actor Colin Firth got into an altercation with rival Rupert Everett after an alcohol fuelled night of BAFTA parties on Sunday. The award winner has a long standing feud with Everett (son of comedian...

1
MADJEZ 26.02.10 5:16pm
MADJEZ
Jesus tells how he found the Way, the Truth and the Life in the IRA

Jesus tells how he found the Way, the Truth and the Life in the IRA...

0
roybland 26.02.10 5:05pm
roybland
The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

Duncan Pugh had the surprise of his life yesterday when he went to Simon Todd's barber shop in Fleet Street., "I asked for a number two round the back and sides and a number one on top. And that's...

6
MrChigleysAunt 26.02.10 4:38pm
brownpaperreporter
Economic growth figures revised upwards; Number 10 denies bullying 0
exigo 26.02.10 3:49pm
exigo
Al-Qaeda to hold Away Day in Weston-super-mare

Terrorist group Al-Qaeda have confirmed they are planning to hold an away day this summer in Weston-super-mare., A spokesperson for the organisation explained that initially there was some disquiet...

0
Ian Searle 26.02.10 3:37pm
Ian Searle
Susan Boyle looks set to become even bigger

Susan Boyle is looking to take advantage of the latest move to ban sexy and raunchy popstars from TV and general media., As sexy or raunchy do not apply to Susan Boyle the oppurtunity to give...

0
Basil_B 26.02.10 2:32pm
Basil_B
Bullying charity gets its head kicked in for grassing

The anti-bullying charity which had foolishly grassed up the Prime Minister got its head "properly kicked in", a spokesman for number 10 said today. "We'd all just had about enough of them grassing...

1
ED209 26.02.10 2:03pm
Rohaq
French Government Invites Quotes for Channel Tunnel Extension

The French Minister for Underwater Development, M. Jean-Jacques Cousteau, today invited tenders for quotations for an impressive extension to the Channel Tunnel network. "We are planning branch...

0
theumpire 26.02.10 1:54pm
theumpire
Fabio Capello raises fears of breakaway England football team

In a tense news conference at Wembley this morning, Fabio Capello raised suspicions over a possible breakaway national side., "This Bridge business is fishy, you know", the Italian manager...

0
exigo 26.02.10 12:29pm
exigo
Portsmouth docked nine ... harbour now full

championship soon...

0
brownpaperreporter 26.02.10 12:02pm
brownpaperreporter
Can't pay... Pompey. Less soon.

Fred Dinage told, "It could be worse" He asks, "HOW?"...

0
Ian Searle 26.02.10 11:21am
Ian Searle
Cheryl Cole to keep out of media spotlight by walking through airport

dressed as Inpector Clouseau...

0
virtuallywill 26.02.10 11:13am
virtuallywill
Opera maverick Miller sets West Side Story in Renaissance Italy

Famed for daring opera productions that relocate historical action to other periods for dramatic effect, Dr. Jonathan Miller has wowed audiences and critics by setting his new production of Leonard...

5
Des Custard 26.02.10 10:37am
bang2rights
Microsoft and Intel launch a machine that never crashes

IT Support teams worldwide refuse to install it...

0
brownpaperreporter 26.02.10 10:33am
brownpaperreporter
Man living in Cloud Cuckoo Land declares 'holy war' on Cuckoo Clock Land 1
Ludicity 26.02.10 10:09am
John Square
Wayne Bridge makes himself available for selection by Cheryl Cole 1
Ludicity 26.02.10 10:06am
brownpaperreporter
Pompeii football club - fans left fuming

A cloud hangs over Pompeii today as the club face administration and a 9 point deduction. Avram Grant is said to be incandescent at the news and many of the players are despondent as they wait for...

0
Pharcite 26.02.10 9:49am
Pharcite
Terry Pratchett books advance tickets to SeaWorld 0
Ludicity 26.02.10 9:45am
Ludicity
GB’s 2014 Winter Olympics campaign to be “Better than Vancouver's crap results"

After Britain’s poor showing at the Winter Olympics a new sporting body has been set up and is calling for a radical and modernising change to the Winter sports schedule The new British Winter...

0
brownpaperreporter 26.02.10 9:44am
brownpaperreporter
Many Hans made light work

The Expenses Scandal just won't go away. David Willett, the Shadow 'Skills' Secretary is facing further criticism today after further details of his claim for changing light bulbs were made public.,...

0
MrChigleysAunt 26.02.10 9:05am
MrChigleysAunt
Gaddafi bans Emmenthal in first salvo of Swiss holey war 0
Duncan Biscuit 26.02.10 9:01am
Duncan Biscuit
Lloyds Bank named as new sponsor of Portsmouth FC 0
Duncan Biscuit 26.02.10 8:59am
Duncan Biscuit
NATS ‘Very Pleased’ with Windows 7 Upgrade

Britain’s National Air Traffic Control System was said to be ‘running very smoothly’ last night following its upgrade to Windows 7. The Application which is used to monitor Britain’s entire...

0
RichT 26.02.10 8:09am
RichT
RBS blame new owners for heavy losses

The head of RBS Stephen Hester has issued a scathing attack on the banks current owners, blaming them for recent heavy losses., Hester told reporters the £3.6bn losses were largely down to bad...

0
edward hack 26.02.10 8:04am
edward hack
French renew territorial claims over Isle of Wight 7
Scroat 26.02.10 1:31am
theumpire
Colin Firth receives acclaim for collecting BAFTA in character

There was much admiration for Colin Firth at Sunday's BAFTAs who (presumably to prove his ability) collected his 'Best Actor' award in the character for which he'd won the aforementioned prize....

0
euankitson 26.02.10 12:18am
euankitson
Homeless reject Travelodge accommodation over lack of facilities. more soon 0
Mrblacker 25.02.10 10:10pm
Mrblacker
Ant & Dec 'very happy' as millions across the country pledge to press the button 0
exigo 25.02.10 7:32pm
exigo
ITV defends decision to show a pair of tits before watershed.

They say they have contractual obligations to Ant and Dec...

0
Ian Searle 25.02.10 6:57pm
Ian Searle
'Pay up Pompey... Pompey pay up !'

More dubious potential owners soon...

0
MADJEZ 25.02.10 6:37pm
MADJEZ