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World wide web “not inhabited by spiders”

Child's fears calmed by scientists...

curry muncher 17.03.10 8:30am
curry muncher
Osama bin Laden Is Now The 'El Cid' Of The Al Queda Movement

Al Queda has brought their 'El Cid' out into the fresh air again to renew belief in their cause and to yank the West's chain. According to news sources Osama bin Laden has made a new video praising...

17.03.10 7:37am
Battery hen conditions 'too soft' says Daily Mail

Conditions in the nations biggest battery chicken sheds were slammed today by the Daily Mail, after its research revealed that chickens enjoy both warmth and shelter. The paper condemned the...

ED209 17.03.10 1:18am
Oldham calls off nuclear strike on Pakistan 0
roybland 16.03.10 10:24pm
Pete Doherty awarded home hearing after completing court loyalty card

It was confirmed yesterday that having collected enough stamps on his court appearance loyalty card, rock singer Pete Doherty has been awarded a home magistrates visit for his next summons. After...

Stan 16.03.10 10:16pm
Chubby Brown 'cleared of assault'. More soon. 0
red 16.03.10 10:06pm
The All New Jeni B
Ashley Cole expresses "deep regret" at not hiring same publicist as Vernon Kay 0
danlewis 16.03.10 10:00pm
Tiger come back invokes fear of drive for more appalling puns... 1
roybland 16.03.10 9:53pm
The All New Jeni B
PM says he believes in life after death 0
roybland 16.03.10 9:43pm
George Osborne to launch own face powder brand 0
roybland 16.03.10 9:34pm
UK visit by leader of paedophile ring may be overshadowed by religion 0
roybland 16.03.10 8:21pm
Lazarus: Absolutely no hope for my mate Becks

David Beckham’s close personal friend and so-called ‘resurrection guru’ Lazarus of Bethany has admitted the England footballer has ‘not a chance in hell’ of playing for England again. As...

jmcl 16.03.10 7:11pm
Sir Liam told to "F*ck right off" by tired people

Britain's Chief Medical Officer, Sir Liam Donaldson was today told to "do one" by thousands of tired, overworked people. In Sir Liam's annual report, he said inactivity was rife, and that research...

John Square 16.03.10 6:49pm
edward hack
Pope Benedict confirms UK visit dates, though he is flying British Airways... 1
MADJEZ 16.03.10 5:48pm
edward hack
Police Officer chokes to death following truncheon attack

The man who killed the police officer in his underpants told the judge 'in my country this is old custom' but the judge 'was not having it' and gave the man life., The female police officer, had...

edward hack 16.03.10 5:38pm
edward hack
Runaway Toyota Prius driver's pants recalled for being on fire. 0
MADJEZ 16.03.10 5:30pm
Npower football sponsorship deal dependent on Portsmouth installing coin meter 1
Duncan Biscuit 16.03.10 5:18pm
Taxpayers shafted by hospital probe 0
Duncan Biscuit 16.03.10 4:30pm
Duncan Biscuit
Laureate says she penned it for Beckham 0
Duncan Biscuit 16.03.10 4:24pm
Duncan Biscuit
British couple arrested in Dubai after having oral sex in a restaurant

A British couple have accused the Arab states of being clueless about western civilisation after Essex girl, Maggie rodes, was arrested for performing a sex act on a total stranger in a restaurant,...

twookey 16.03.10 4:12pm
‘Baby Branson’ facing fraud probe ‘taking similarity too far’

Vats all, folks...

Duncan Biscuit 16.03.10 4:11pm
Duncan Biscuit
Labour expected to win General Election after wording change of voting cards

"If you do not wish to vote for a candidate please place a cross next to their name. By submitting this voting card you are indicating your consent to vote the incumbant political party back into...

simonjmr 16.03.10 4:01pm
Low voter turnout could mean shock election win for Apathy Party

'In the last General Election 39% of the electorate didn't vote,' said Apathist leader, Kevin Dullard, 'if that figure were translated into parliamentary seats we could win an overall majority. Not...

Ludicity 16.03.10 3:43pm
Research continues into why teenage girls pull their jumper down over their arse

when they get up from a seat...

roybland 16.03.10 3:22pm
Sir Patrick returns to the Beeb with the Sky at Night

Moore soon...

Basil_B 16.03.10 3:00pm
F1 tracks to have slots under new "increased overtaking" regulations 0
chrissles65 16.03.10 2:58pm
Liverpool Anthem adapted for Beckham: You'll Never Walk Again 0
malgor 16.03.10 2:04pm
Petrol Stations rebranded in new HonestGov initiative

Nice. Perhaps the 'Give Way' sign should read 'Give Up'...

red 16.03.10 1:58pm
Network Rail seek replacement bus service for High Speed rail link.

Network Rail has requested quotes for the replacement Bus Service for the yet to be “green-lighted” high speed rail link, If construction does go ahead it could begin as early as 2017, the...

virtuallywill 16.03.10 12:43pm
Man's last slave dies from asking too many rhetorical questions 0
Oxbridge 16.03.10 12:06pm